ND: Generation 8 - Noble Doubt

Chapter 8.21: Dear Diary, New Girl

An Excerpt from the Journal of Jade Seaforth:

May 29—It’s been one week since my husband’s funeral and I am still numb from head to toe. At night, when I’m alone in the bed I shared with him, I clutch his pillow that smells of his shampoo and sob until my stomach hurts and there is nothing left inside me.

During the day, I move robotically through the tasks I must accomplish. Kai’s parents have not left my side, and I’m not comfortable showing my grief in front of them.

A rage that cannot be appeased is building within me.

If only I had my girls here with me, but they are away at the boarding school Bram and Kara donate to. I didn’t want to send them away, and I’m sure they’re angry with me. Rightly so. But everything happened in a whirlwind. I’ll try to explain.

Bram is the head of some philanthropic company called the Neptune Foundation. Kai’s family has been involved with this company for several generations. I don’t know any details because when Bram and Kara speak of it, it’s all cloak and dagger. As an attorney, I want to grill them with the questions I have about the whole thing, but Bram told me the less I know, the better.

I get the feeling the Neptune Foundation is a front for something else much darker. Kara explained to me the reason I had to send the girls away was for their own safety. Once the Neptune Foundation was involved, there could be repercussions I could not even imagine. I did not know what that meant, but I took Kara seriously when she said it might endanger my girls.

Backing up a little, when we found out Molly Hill from across the street had been stalking Kai. It wasn’t long before we discovered she had tampered with his motorcycle. She caused his deadly accident.

The police were on top of it, thankfully, but my in-laws wanted more.

So did I.

Molly Hill deserved a fate worse than death, and it was Bram’s connections that would make that happen. Yes, Molly was in jail awaiting her trial, but that wasn’t enough. What if she wasn’t convicted? There were no witnesses to her crime. We only knew about it because she had foolishly told a friend of hers she’d done it. The friend hadn’t actually seen Molly meddle with Kai’s bike.

I know it’s wrong to wish ill on someone, but Molly’s selfish actions have destroyed my family. Every cell in my body is screaming out for revenge. I want that woman to suffer. I want her to languish in the same pain she has inflicted on me and the girls.

“Are you sure it was right to help the Edwards woman?” Kara asked as we gathered in the living room of my cold, barren home.

Bram nodded in her direction. He was so good at maneuvering through life, I almost forgot he was blind.

“The Neptune Foundation is about helping people. This other… thing we’re involved in with Molly Hill is as far away from what we’re supposed to be using the company for as possible.” His mouth was a grim line as he added, “This is something my father would have done.”

Kara’s icy blue eyes softened, and she took Bram’s hand. “I know, honey, but Kai was our only child.” A sob caught in her throat, reminding me she wasn’t the heartless woman she often appeared. “I just want him back.”

They held each other for a moment as Bram rubbed her back, whispering, “I know. I know.”

I had to look away because I didn’t want to break down in front of them. I didn’t have anyone to hug or cling to. I’d sent them away.

“I want to bring the girls home,” I said, my voice quivering.

“I’m sorry, Jade,” Bram said. “I wish you could, but it wouldn’t be wise. You have no idea what the fallout might be. We’re tampering with things we shouldn’t be.”

Kara took my hand now and squeezed it. “Bram is right. I wish the girls could be here, too, but it’s for their own good.”

What had I done? I’d traded my children for vengeance. It was too late to go back now. I only hoped Gigi and Sophie would forgive me.

An excerpt from the diary of Georgia Seaforth:

Dear Diary, boarding school sucks. Three days after finding out Sophie and I were being sent to Golden Oak School for Girls, we arrived. The trip there was with a nun who told us to call her Sister Joan.

Sophie and I held hands the entire trip, and every time a sob wrenched itself free from her chest, I gave her a little squeeze. As for me, my crying was over with. Instead, I found myself full of acrimony, the bitterness turning my heart to stone. I could no longer weep for my father, as I was all cried out.

It was when we reached our destination Sister Joan informed us we would be in separate wings of the school, unable to see each other except in passing, that the final shard of resentment planted itself in my soul. Was there nothing in my control?

Sophie began to cry again.

“Please, you can’t separate us. Don’t you know our father just died? My sister needs me.”

“I’m so sorry for your loss, Georgia. I can’t tell you how awful I feel about your circumstances. But rules are rules. Your sister must be with her own age group.”

Bending down, I held Sophie tight against my chest, stroking her hair.

“I will find you as often as I can,” I promised through her tears of despair. “Be brave, okay?”

She nodded. But even as the words slipped past my lips, a loathing so great I could barely contain it hit me. My mother was back at home, the house we shared with our father, in her comfortable bed, surrounded by familiar things.

They had cast Sophie and me out like last week’s trash. Just like that, without so much as a backward glance from our mother.

I was carefree and happy only a couple weeks ago. Now, I was filled to the brim with a hate so great, I didn’t know how I would ever contain it.

After Sophie and I said our goodbyes, Sister Joan showed me to my room. I stopped dead in my tracks as soon as I realized I wasn’t alone in there.

I didn’t know I’d be sharing it with anyone else. There was so much I didn’t know.

“Oh, hey! You’re here!” the girl said, jumping off her bed to greet me. “My name is Meredith. What’s yours?”

“Does it matter?” I asked, throwing my bag on the other bed.

Instead of being offended, she laughed. “Uh, yeah, it kind of matters since we’re roommates. I need to know what to call you. I can’t just say new girl all the time.”

“My name is Georgia, but you can call me Gigi,” I said with a sigh, my tone flat.

“Hi, Gigi. Look, I get it. You don’t want to be here. Few of us do. I mean, none of us would be here if we hadn’t caused some kind of trouble back home.”

My right eyebrow went up. “What do you mean?”

Her eyes widened. “What do you mean? You don’t even know where you’ve landed, do you?”

“This is a school for troubled girls. You know, some of us have gotten in trouble. Like, Doris, she is a total kleptomaniac while just down the hall lives Staci who beat a girl pretty bad. We all end up here.”

We all end up here? I repeated in my head, my jaw dropping. Then my heart sank. How was it Sophie and I ended up in a place like this? What had we ever done except mourn our father’s passing?

“Why are you here?” I asked her, my head still reeling.

“My parents were killed in a fire and my aunt and uncle didn’t know what to do with me,” she said with a shrug.

This situation was getting worse by the minute.

Later, Meredith was instructed to bring me to the principal’s office. Her name was Ms. Hanover, and she was just as ghastly as anyone else.

Ms. Hanover explained the rules to me, all the while looking as disgusted as could be. I barely heard anything she said because her chest distracted me.

Her breasts were huge, stuffed into a cone shaped bra.

“Do you understand?” she snarled at me.

“Yes,” I mumbled, resisting the urge to call her iron tits.

It was a name that would catch on throughout the school in such a way that no one was quite sure where it had come from. But every time I heard someone call her that, a smug smile came to my lips.

I had no choice but to endure whatever befell me. But there was no reason I couldn’t take my bitterness out through sarcasm from that day forward.

Thank you so much for reading, liking, lurking, and commenting! I hope you enjoyed today’s chapter!

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See you Wednesday for… uh, something! LOL Then, Saturday at 10am (EST) for the next chapter of Noble Doubt!


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I am a simmer, Rennie garb wearer, author, and dog petter. Judy Garland is my queen, horror movies & classic movies are my jam. A little bit eccentric, owned by cats. 🐱🐱🐱

38 Comments on “Chapter 8.21: Dear Diary, New Girl

  1. Oh, this so, SO uncool! Jade is already having second thoughts, and rightfully so. I understand wanting vengeance but at what cost? I don’t think any amount of damage control will ever heal this situation. Gigi is so full of hate and rage now, and she’ll never, ever be the same, even if Jade changes her mind right away and calls them home. And WTF sending them to a place for troubled girls?!?! They did absolutely nothing wrong – NOTHING! This is so not a good environment for either of them. And the final nail in the coffin – separating them. Well, this will go one of two ways for Soph. She’ll either get strong because she now has to depend on herself or it’ll completely break her. These poor girls are going to have to dig deep and find their resilience if they’re ever to survive in a place like this. Oh, how I want to just shake Bram and Kara!

  2. They are doing things they shouldn’t be for revenge and that’s why they send away the girls. I don’t think we should be all for revenge, what about what it’s doing to Jade and the girls? They need to mourn as a family. It’s no time to be focused on getting revenge now. Poor girls will now be seperated even within the school.

    1. Revenge sounds good as an idea when you’re hurt and angry, but I think most people would not act upon it. I agree they need to mourn as a family and figure out how to get through this.

  3. I really needed that iron tits at the end to break me out of the mood I was in. I’m really angry at this situation! I literally teared up when the girls discovered they were going to be separated. And what’s all this about the Neptune Foundation?? How in the world does this have anything to do with anything, and why in the world would the girls be in danger? And to put them in a place with troubled girls?? Kara would be so done if one of those girls hurts Gigi and Sophie. There’s nothing wrong with them! As much as I hate that they’re separated, this could be a great opportunity for Sophie to get strong. She’s been emotionally dependent on everyone her whole life, and now she’ll have to finally learn how to self-soothe and deal with her own feelings.

    You’re never getting off probation, by the way.

    1. Thank you, Jess. I didn’t figure probation would end any time soon. lol

      This is an angering situation, it’s true. Bram is still the head of the Neptune Foundation, but he is using contacts he’s made throughout the years. The girls are definitely in danger, although you may not find out how for a while. There are girls there that might hurt Sophie or Gigi, let’s hope not, though. I like what you said about Sophie, btw. This might actually strengthen her.

  4. This just seems to be getting darker and darker. 😭 I don’t think I like what Kara, Bram, and Jade are getting themselves into. Vengeance isn’t really the answer and as Jade said herself: she lost her girls because of it. If they end up resenting her for this forever, she may well have lost them for good.
    And the girls aren’t exactly in a good environment. It seems like a recipe for disaster! But then I am very interested in learning more about all these troubled girls. So many possibilities for some interesting stories. Can’t wait to learn more. 😊

    1. Thank you, Louise. It is getting pretty dark. You’re right that vengeance isn’t really the answer. Jade is paying a high price for this scheme. Let’s hope Jade hasn’t lost the girls for good, but I don’t know how their relationship can recover from this blow. There are definitely many possibilities here. 😀

  5. My heart is breaking for those poor girls. At least now we have a better understanding of what drove Jade to do it, though I fear vengeance won’t give her the peace she’s looking for.

    1. Thank you, Jacquie. My heart is breaking for the girls, too. You are definitely right about vengeance not giving Jade the peace she’s looking for. It never does.

  6. Wow everything is falling apart at the seams.. i feel so bad for the whole family. Such a horrible trade. Poor girls. It all sounds so hopeless.

  7. This is horrible! They sent the girls into this… juvie and separated them! I don’t understand what exactly is going on with the Neptune foundation, but this is inexcusable. Why are the girls in danger? I don’t blame Gigi for feeling hateful. Right now I hope she will separate herself from the family completely when she grows up and finds happiness somewhere else with someone else.

  8. Wow! That’s all I can say. I don’t really understand why the adults couldn’t have explained all that to the girls, well, at least to GIGI

    1. Thank you, Jo. I guess they didn’t feel like it would have benefitted the girls to know. I agree Gigi is old enough to be told some things and it’s a shame the adults didn’t think she should know.

  9. I understand more now, but why did they send the kids to such a horrible place? There could’ve been another option, and they could’ve told the girls more about what they were doing.

    1. Thank you, Cathy. I think Bram thought the girls needed to be in a strict environment for their safety. There probably could have been another option that would have been better, but they also didn’t have much time to plan. I agree with you that they should’ve explained some of this to the girls. It’s a shame they didn’t.

  10. Poor Jade. She must be feeling so numb and devastated and furious all at the same time. I suppose it’s good she knows more about the Neptune Foundation and what Molly Hill did. Some kind of understanding and a little closure, though of course she wants more than that. I wonder what’ll happen to Molly as she awaits trial or whether she’ll make it to the trial date at all…

    Iron Tits 😂😂😂 I suppose it could be worse! xx

    1. Thank you, Caz. xo You’ve hit the nail on the head in describing where Jade is at. Molly is in a world of hurt right now, and she doesn’t even realize the full extent of what is coming. lol

      LOL! Yes, it could have been much, much worse.

  11. This all has me wondering what the heck Kara has made Bram do. I am putting all the blame on her because he clearly didn’t seem pleased. And Jade was longing to have the girls back with her. She was grief stricken and allowed Kara and Bram to make decisions for her. Now that she’s having second thoughts, it’s evidently too late as the wheels have been put in motion. I have some far out ideas I’ll keep to myself for now. As for Gigi and Sophie – that place is awful. I guess it’s supposed to help troubled kids, but it seems like a juvenile detention center dressed up with flowers. Iron tits is one and the unreasonable ‘rules’ that are separating the sisters from each other. At least Meredith seems like she might be nice, however, Gigi is become hardened and cynical. Poor kids and poor Jade. This isn’t going to end well.

    1. Thank you so much, Audrey. That’s a good question about what Kara has made Bram do. I can totally see why you see her behind it all, and I reckon that is true. Bram definitely is not pleased about it all. You’re right that Jade has realized too late what she has done. I think Kara took advantage of Jade’s grief and shock. I wish I could see your far out ideas! LOL 😀 I bet they are good! Gigi didn’t realize she was being sent to anything other than a regular boarding school. I was thinking Bram would think this was the way to keep them safest, in an environment that was stricter. Meredith is nice, but don’t believe everything she says. LOLOL Just a little FYI there I probably shouldn’t give away. haha

  12. I am angry.

    I know this chapter was meant to help us see things from the perspective before hidden to us, and to understand the characters involved a little better. But still I am angry and I believe this is the most important statement in this chapter and chapter to come:

    “What had I done? I’d traded my children for vengeance. It was too late to go back now. I only hoped Gigi and Sophie would forgive me.”

    Because I know, even though his death was caused by a woman who was ill in so many degrees, Kai would not want ANY of this for his family. So yes I am angry, for all of them I want to be clear. But I will try to like Kara better. I had forgotten that the foundation is the reason for the change in her. And I do understand the want for vengeance, for if this was my husband………… I will leave it at that.

    1. Thank you, Bee. I hear you. I’m angry, too. You’re right. I did want you to see what motivated Bram, Kara, and Jade to send the girls away, and to show what was happening behind the scenes. Even so, because they are so full of vengeance, and did this heartless thing to the girls, I know there can be no sympathy.

      You are also right that Kai wouldn’t want any of this for his family. I like that you will try to like Kara better, but I do realize, at the same time, that her desire for revenge is making her unlikable.

  13. First thought: I thought the accident happened because Kai wasn’t paying attention. I’m an idiot! Second thought: I thought Bram shut down The Neptune Foundation after his father pretty much ran it to the ground. Third thought: HOW COULD THEY SEPARATE THE GIRLS?!?! THEY NEED EACH OTHER!!!!😭

    1. Thank you, Hilly. You’re not an idiot lol. It wasn’t explained until now, so any thought you had about it could have been the real deal. As for the Neptune Foundation, Kai still has contacts and is the head of the company. IKR? About the girls. Unfortunately, they are far apart in age, so Sophie and Gigi are being sent to their own age groups. It’s not what the girls need right now, though.

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