PART 1: Bea is a Mom
Dear Diary, my favorite place at the youth center is the courtyard. I think it’s Kara’s favorite place, too. She likes the flowers and being outside. Now, when I visit, I make sure we come out here because this is where she seems most at ease.
She is shy, but her curiosity often overrides her desire to shrink away from me. Tonight, I told her about her little brothers.
“And, are they nice?” she asked, her voice small and childlike.
“They’re nice,” I said, “although, they are loud and rambunctious, too. The older one, Andy, is more cautious. He thinks before he acts. While Joey jumps right in.”
“Do they get in trouble?”
Seeing her frown, I tried to give her a reassuring smile. “All children get in trouble now and then. It’s normal.”
“What happens to them when they’re in trouble?”
I wanted to take her hand or hug her. Even after visiting for days on end, I still hadn’t been able to touch her. Having open conversations with her was progress, she seemed to trust me more and more. But I wanted to hold my daughter in my arms at last.
“It depends on what they’ve done. Sometimes, they’re not allowed to play video games when they’ve been naughty.”
The youth center had video games, so I knew Kara understood my frame of reference.
She nodded a little, accepting my answer. “Do you hit them when you’re angry?”
Every time she asked a question like this, my heart broke a little more. “No, we don’t hit the boys. And…” My voice trailed off as I tried to form words to address this. “Kara, honey, I’m sorry if your father hit you when he was angry. It was wrong of him to do that.”
Her back stiffened a little, and she stared at her hot pink sneakers. “He loved me.”
My eyes burned as I held back tears. “I know- yes, he loved you. Sometimes, even when parents love their children, they make mistakes.”
Except Jem hadn’t made mistakes. A mistake is forgetting to pay your electric bill, or not putting gas in your car and then running out. Jem made decisions, not mistakes. I wished he was standing in front of me now so I could kill him.
Kara was quiet in thought, so I took that time to quiet my burning rage.
After a while, we meandered inside where some of the kids were playing ping pong. I wanted to move closer, hoping Kara would join them, but she hung back.
“They’re pretty good,” I said with a smile.
“They like this game.”
“Do you want to play?”
Worry clouded her eyes, and she took a step backward.
“It’s okay, we’ll just watch then.”
A few minutes later, she turned toward me and I saw a question in her eyes. Often when I thought she was about to ask me something, she would change her mind and remain quiet. So, I tried to give her an encouraging smile.
“I like your hair.”
“Thank you.” I liked the tiny smile playing on her lips.
“I want hair like yours,” she said.
I can’t tell you how much that small statement thrilled me. It was as if, for the first time, she was really trying to connect with me.
“Well, let’s go find your brush,” I said with a grin.
We went to her room, which was nice and surprisingly comfortable. I had brought most of the personal items in the room to her. I was pleased that she’d treated her things with such care.
She handed me her brush, and I began gently brushing her hair. I’d wanted to do this since the first moment I saw her.
As I brushed, I spoke to her, “My mother used to brush my hair. When I was a little girl, she would either braid it or put it in these silly little pigtails. When I was a little older, she showed me how to use bobby pins to hold it in place. I wore it like that for years.”
Kara didn’t respond verbally, but as I tenderly showed her how to brush her hair out of her face, and pin it back, she relaxed.
“Look at that,” I said with a grin. “There’s a beautiful girl underneath all that hair.”
Her smile widened as she regarded herself in the mirror.
“I like it,” she said.
All at once, I had an idea to run by Dr. Fellowes.
PART 2: A Progress Report
After my visit with Kara, I ran into Dr. Fellowes in the hall.
“You’re here late,” I said.
She had a lovely smile. “There was an admission, so I stayed late. Would you like to talk about Kara for a few minutes?”
It was getting late, but she didn’t have to ask me twice. I followed her into her office and took a seat on one couch.
“It’s gracious of you to meet with me when you could be on your way home.”
“Kara’s case is unusual, and more than anything,” she said, “I want her to succeed.”
Perry was right about Dr. Fellowes. She was a good doctor. I always had the sense she cared about Kara. In turn, I felt better about Kara being in the youth center.
“She let me brush her hair,” I said, the words gushing forward like water over a dam. “No, actually, she asked me to!”
“That’s wonderful! How’d she do with it?”
“She was fine… relaxed. I am so encouraged by this. I think she’s come a long way.”
Erika’s reaction was more subdued. “It would seem so.”
“Come on, I mean, doesn’t this mean she’s made progress?”
“Yes, of course. It’s only that I don’t want you to build your hopes up so high that if she takes a few steps backward, you plummet into despair.”
“You’ve already explained how this will be a bumpy ride. Let me have my moment of joy,” I said.
“This is a happy occasion, certainly, I only want you to be cautious.”
“Has something happened with Kara that makes you feel this way?”
Dr. Fellowes paused, then said, “No, nothing has happened. Her progress has been slow because she doesn’t know how to relate to the other kids. She feels like an outsider. On top of that, she’s learning about the things around her.”
I knew what Dr. Fellowes was saying was true. Kara had never slept in a bed before, or eaten at a table. She’d never been to school or met other children.
“I want to take her to the salon with me so we can get our hair done together.”
Erika’s eyes widened. “I don’t think she’s ready for that. In the center, the environment is controlled. If you take her on an outing, who knows how she will react?”
“There’s only one way to find out,” I said.
“I’m sorry. It’s too soon,” Erika Fellowes said with a frown.
PART 3: Bea Blows Up
After I got home, I was too tired to do much of anything, so I took a bath and went to bed. The next morning, I knew Perry would be in his office, so I went there to speak to him.
“I’m sorry I got home so late last night,” I said. Then, I told him how it all went.
“That’s great, honey, that she let you do her hair. I’d say that’s a real step forward.”
“Me, too!” I couldn’t stop the grin from taking residence on my face. “I want to take her to the salon so we can get our hair done together.”
“Wait- what?”
“I think it would be a terrific day for the both of us! We could get our hair done, have lunch. Maybe do a little shopping.”
“Do you really think she’s ready for all of that?”
Ice gripped my heart when I heard the doubt in his voice. “Why would you say that to me?”
He hesitated, then said, “I think it’s too soon. The only people she has seen are the ones in the center. Bea, I haven’t even gotten to see her yet. How could you think she’s ready to go out when she hasn’t even met the rest of her family?”
My fingers were shaking as I brushed my hair back off my face. “You don’t understand! This was real progress today and I think we have to strike now, while the iron is hot.”
The ice around my heart froze even harder, entering my veins, closing my mind.
Perry’s lower lip twitched, then, he cleared his throat. “Bea… her letting you brush her hair is a far cry from leaving the center. She doesn’t even know what a salon is, for goodness’ sake. Don’t you think that would be overwhelming for her?”
“You know what’s overwhelming? People- no, strangers telling me I can’t bring my own child home! Telling me when I can see her, what I can say, and not letting me touch her! That’s overwhelming, Perry!”
He stood still like a statue, but in his eyes, I saw bewilderment. “For you. That’s overwhelming for you. We’re talking about Kara, though.”
His words hit me like a slap in the face. I knew he was right, this was about Kara, not me. Still, this rage inside engulfed me from head to toe, and it needed release.
“Oh. You’re wearing that,” Mom said as she came in.
Before I could stop myself, I’d turned on her, waving my finger, my face a mask of fury.
“I’ve about had enough with your criticisms, old woman!” I growled. Inside, I knew I would regret this later, but at that moment, I didn’t care. It was as if that fissure of steel and ice were in charge of me now.
“Bea, I-“
“Would it kill you to say something nice once in a while to your own daughter? Do you know how fed up I am with all your little judgments? I’m fed up to here!” I yelled.
I was taking heaving breaths when Perry interjected himself.
“Uh, let’s go for a walk, Bea.”
Mother stood there in stunned silence.
“I think that’s a terrific idea!” I said, my voice still raised.
“I’ll pick the boys up from school,” Mom mumbled.
PART 4: It’s Andy & Joey Day
When Mom came home with the boys, I’d cooled off. Perry tried to talk reason to me, but I was too embarrassed and waved him away.
As for mom, she and I avoided each other. I knew I should apologize. Something inside me resisted that for now.
Finally, Perry asked me, “Do you still want to take the boys out? Maybe we should do it another time.”
We’d planned on an outing with the boys where we would tell them about Kara. It was important, so I thought we should go ahead with it.
We took them to their favorite burger place, Eureka’s Grill, and ate outside.
The boys told us about their day at school as we ate, chattering non-stop about the sports they wanted to play this year.
Joey was more of a hotdog man, then burger eater. He said, “I want to play baseball. Tryouts are next week!”
“Baseball’s for wusses,” Andy said around bites of his hamburger. “I’m trying out for soccer again.”
As they fussed with each other, I spoke over them. “Did you bring your permission slips home? None of this is happening if we don’t sign.”
They both shrugged as if they’d never heard of a permission slip in their life. As I turned to Perry, they kicked at each other under the table.
“I bet the slips are in their backpacks,” Perry said.
He was probably right.
Once we were done eating, and cleaning our table off, we finally told the boys about their older sister. They knew Kara existed, and that she was missing, but they didn’t know we’d found her.
We explained she was at the youth center and that she would be there for a long time. In as few words as possible, I told them why she couldn’t come home.
“We’ll bring you to see her soon,” I told them.
They each had a different reaction. Joey’s eyes lit up, and he was excited. Andy crossed his arms in front of him and looked worried.
“Isn’t this great news, guys?” I asked.
“Yeah!” Joey exclaimed. “I think it’s great to have a big sister! I want to show her my favorite Hot Wheel car!”
He’d been collecting Hot Wheel’s of all ages since he was little. It was nice he wanted to share that with Kara.
“What’s wrong, Andy?” Perry asked.
“Right now, I’m the oldest. I don’t think it will be so great not being the oldest anymore.”
“Well,” said Perry, “I didn’t think of that. You’ll still be the oldest in a way, though. You’re the oldest boy.”
“Oh, yeah,” he said.
“Who’s ready to go to the ruins?” I asked.
The ruins were a mini Stonehenge clear outside town. The boys enjoyed going there, so on special occasions, we liked to surprise them with it.
“Yeah!” they yelled, high-fiving each other.
Once there, the boys ran across the bridge that would take them to the ruins. I walked down by the water to catch my breath.
It was a moment before I left my thoughts long enough to realize Perry was beside me.
“I’m sorry about earlier today,” I said.
He nodded a little. “I know you’re frustrated about the situation with Kara.”
“That doesn’t give me the right to talk to you that way. You’re right. She isn’t ready for an outing like that. And, she needs to meet you and boys.”
“I hate the situation as much as you do,” he said. “I love that little girl, and I’ve missed her so much.”
As he spoke, I felt a little of the ice in my veins melting. “I know you do.”
“I’m worried about you, Bea. You feel distant. And cold.”
Tears filled my eyes as I took his hand. “I’m just trying to cope with it all and I don’t know what I’m doing.”
He squeezed my fingers, then kissed my hand. “None of us do.”
Notes:
In today’s chapter I used poses that Bee made from her Child Emotions Pack. Thanks, Bee!
In some other news, this site, which uses the Newspaper Theme, was chosen by tagDiv (theme creator) to be displayed in their showcase! You can find it here, if you scroll down: Newspaper Theme Showcase!
Thank you for reading, liking, lurking, and commenting! It means a lot!
I can understand Bea’s outburst. She’s under this immense stress and it just feels like her mother only criticizes. Can’t be pleasant.
But it is a crummy time for all of them.
Thank you so much, Violincat 🙂 You’re right about the crummy time they’re having. Luckily, next gen will be brighter. 😀
I know I’ve said this before, but this is such a tough and sad situation. Bea wants to be a mom to Kara and do normal mom things with her, but thanks to that ass Jem, that can’t happen right now. It’s so heartbreaking all around and could’ve possibly been avoided. There’s so much time to make up for, and I really hope they aren’t just chasing their tails. So heartbreaking!
Thank you, Sharon. ❤ My heart was broken throughout all of this part, too. All Bea wants is her daughter back. Now, she doesn’t even know Kara. It’s so difficult.
I love that Kara asked for help with her hair! It really is a step forward. Bea is acting selfishly, but I can’t blame her because she does come from a place of love for her daughter. But right now she has to show she’s a bigger person than Jem was and put Kara’s wellbeing first.
Really, Ellie, that’s the first thing you say when walking into a room??? I know Bea shouldn’t have blown up on her, but Ellie really needs to look at how she can improve herself, too.
It’s cute how the boys reacted. It may be hard to have such a big change as kids, but I hope they will take it well.
Love the Cesare approved at the end. 😊 Congrats on being featured!
Thank you so much, Heather. 🙂 Kara is definitely showing progress. I think you’re right about Bea; that she is acting selfishly. This is about Kara, not her. But you’re right that it’s because she loves her and wants to make up for lost time. You’re absolutely right that she needs to put Kara’s well being before her own feelings.
You’re right about Ellie, too. She’s so snarky.
I hope the boys will take it well, too. It will definitely be an adjustment, but maybe they’re up to the task. I think a lot of how they handle it will depend on how Bea and Perry handle it.
I’m so glad you love the Cesare approved! 😀 He’s my best buddy and writing partner. 😀 😀
I’m so sorry it took me so long to comment! Hmmm I can totally understand Bea and how she must be feeling, this is a very tough situation..! She’s not taking all this well (at least not as well as is needed), so I’m glad she has Perry to put her back to the ground. I love Perry by the way, he’s such a nice, gentle man! <3
Gulp – I didn't expect Bea to shout at her mother like that, but I guess years of constantly incoming snarky comments can do that to you – but I hope they'll both find some middle ground, they're family after all!
Can't wait to see more of little Kara's progress! Great chapter <3
Hello! 😀 And don’t be sorry. 🙂 I’m sorry for my delay in replying. You’re right about Bea and how she’s not taking this as well as she needs to. If Perry wasn’t there, I think she’d be a wreck and doing all the wrong things. lol I’m glad you love Perry. After Bea’s first marriage, it’s nice to know she got it right this time. haha
Bea really let loose on Ellie! haha Hopefully, you’re right and they will one day get along.
A well functioning couple is my DREAM. Look at them communicating and apologising to one another! YES!
I’m glad Bea didn’t take Kara out after all. I think that would have been waaaay too much but I can totally understand why she wanted to do that. She’s in such a hard position and it’s going to take time. It’s never going to be how she wanted, sadly. I wonder when she’ll come to terms with that..
Thank you so much. 🙂 It would be nice if she came to terms with that soon. But, she has some grand ideas that will be hard to live up to. More about that on Saturday. It was so hard for her, not being able to take Kara out. You’re right in that it will never be how she wanted.
It has been a while since I caught up with the episodes and I finally did today. I am happy they found Kara and her progress at the center. I hope the boys and Kara bond well. Looking forward!
Thank you so much, Gayathri. It’s so kind of you to read, and I’m so glad you’re caught up. I hope the boys and Kara bond well, too. We’ll know very soon. 😀
Greetings from the Den of Lurkers! I’ve gotta say that I’ve been loving the drama again! Your writing is so emotional & full of impact!
We’ve only just met her, but I’m already cheering for Kara. She’s a sweet girl. I hope she comes out of this alright.
Slow down, Bea! I’m glad she’s got Perry to keep her grounded.
Hellloooooo, and thank you, fluffy! 😀 I’m so glad you’ve been enjoying the drama! There’s plenty to go around here, that’s for sure. haha Thank you so much for your kind words, they mean a lot to me.
I’m glad you’re cheering for Kara! I am, too, and can’t wait to see what she brings to the story.
I agree that Bea needs to slow down. You’re right that it’s a good thing Perry is a voice of reason here.
I know this has to be incredibly difficult for Bea, but of course Perry is right that they have to do what’s best for Kara. She seems to be making good progress so far. Maybe she will be ready for an outing with her mom soon. 🙂
It’s a wonder Bea didn’t go off on Ellie sooner. She’s better than I am because I would have said something a long time ago. It sounds like Ellie almost never has anything nice or positive to say to her daughter, and that can get really tired really fast. I don’t like to surround myself with negative people, and my own mom is pretty negative herself. I don’t visit as much as I should because of the way she makes me feel about myself. I couldn’t imagine having her live with me! Ellie could try a little harder to be sympathetic towards Bea. 🤷🏻♀️
The boys are adorable! I bet they will be excited to meet their older sister when she is ready. 😊
Thank you so much. 🙂 You’re right that this is really hard for Bea. All she wants is to make up for the time she’s lost and she feels so limited. Perry is the voice of reason right now, and it’s good she listens to him. I think deep down, she knows this is about Kara and what’s best for her.
I think you’re right about Ellie and her attitude. This definitely shows Bea is at the end of her endurance. lol Staying away from negative people sounds like a good idea. I’m sorry, though, that that includes your mom. That’s gotta be so hard on you. I believe Ellie and Bea are going to come to a head soon.
I love the boys! I’m glad you like them, too. I can’t believe how much Andy looks like Perry, and Joey looks like Holden. 😀
This situation is definitely hard for Bea and I sympathize with her. I’m glad the doctor and Perry both gently told her that it wasn’t a good idea. Kara is not ready for that yet, and what’s best for her is very important right now. Thank goodness Perry is so gentle and loving! <3
Thank you, Raymond 🙂 Bea really found a good man in Perry. ❤ I think Bea is going to need these gentle reminders because she longs so much for Kara to be home, and to make up for lost time.
Oh, i hoped she was going to take her kid to the salon. But now i’m wondering if the brothers will be the ones to get Cara to loosen up.
Thank you, Jina. 🙂 I’m planning a great outing with Kara and Bea in the future, once Kara’s more adjusted. As for the brothers, that’s a really great thought! You just might be right.
Progresses with Kara are actually so slow, that makes me worried about her.
Thank you so much 🙂 I can see why you’re worried. I think Kara will be all right if they continue to go slow with her. Well, we hope so anyway. 🙂
So it means (perhaps) years of education.
Yes, perhaps. Let’s hope she can come home soon.
A good point in the difference between mistakes and decisions. Will she ever be able to forgive him for what he did, for the damage he’s caused Kara and the rest of the family..?
I’m glad Dr. Fellowes is a good doctor, I think in this situation it can make so much difference to the parents, as well as the child to have someone with their best interests at heart. It must be so hard though, to want to do things and get back to some kind of ‘normality’ with Kara but having to take things really slowly, to worry it’ll be overwhelming for her. With everything being so new, there’s no saying how she’ll react to things. It’s easy to see how these issues can come between partners in a relationship, both scared of making mistakes, both scared for their daughter, both with their own ideas of what they should do. It’s good they’re able to talk fairly openly with each other and negotiate to see each other’s perspective by the end.
Caz xx
Thank you, Caz. 🙂 That’s a good question as to whether she’ll ever be able to forgive Jem or not. I hope she can because she would do so much better if she let go of some of this.
You make such good points about the issues that can come between relationship partners. I have a feeling, this situation will either make them or break them. Let’s hope it’s the former. I think you’re right that they have their openness with each other as a plus. xo
Goodness Breathe Bea … and I am not sure how I feel about the ” plummet into despair” counselor but I am beginning to think Bea needs to see one too
Thank you, Lisa. Right? It’s clear she can’t handle this on her own. I did mention in the past she has been seeing a counselor since the kidnapping, but maybe Perry better ask her if she’s been going lately.
Indeed .. she does not need to breakdown no!
You couldn’t be more right. She’s got to be there for her other two children and her husband, too, as well as Kara.
Perry is the perfect counterbalance. Love him! I would have said the same thing to Andy. “you’re still the oldest boy”
That’s how I refer to my girls and boys. I have two one’s and two two’s. It’s amazing how birth order, regardless if one is the third child and the oldest boy, the behavior of the firsts is the same. At least that’s been my experience.
Thank you, Jolie. That’s been my experience, too, regarding birth order. I would have said what Perry did as well. I have one boy and one girl, and once, they wanted to know who my favorite was. Well, that was my answer, “You’re my favorite boy, and you’re my favorite girl.” 🙂 I think I used their ages that way once, too. “You’re my favorite seven year old, you’re my favorite five year old.” LOL
We’re so smart!
Great minds and all that. 😀
Oh, congratulations on having your site chosen as a theme exemplar! That’s marvelous!
Also, the writing in this chapter is exceptional. I was nearly in tears by the beginning of the conversation with the counselor, and then so concerned by the chapter’s end. I have few worries for Kara, and many worries for Bea. Hate isn’t the answer. It’s the destroyer. Perry is my hero right now, so I haven’t given up hope.
Also, I really believe there are no bad people, only broken ones. Everyone deserves to be loved. Everyone deserves forgiveness.
Thank you so much, CT. I’m so touched by your kind words. I’m glad you could feel the emotion of the chapter. I can see why you have more worries about Bea right now than Kara. Kara is in good hands and she’s showing progress. You are right about hate and what it does. I’m glad you mentioned Perry in the same sentence as “hope.” I think there is a lot of hope to be had, especially with Perry around.
I like what you said about people being broken, not bad. I think everyone deserves forgiveness, too.
Poor Bea. I can understand why she was upset. She wants her daughter back so much. How hard must it be not to be able to touch her. I’m glad everyone made her realize she needs to put Kara’s well being first. I know as a mother, you just think if you wrap your arms around your children they will magically be okay. And that’s true for a skinned knee. But Kara’s whole soul is skinned. It’s gonna take more than a warm hug. A lot of time and patience. And actually, I’m glad she yelled at her mom. I’m just about done with her too!
Oh….I wanted to add, I had to go to the reader to read your blog today, as the side columns were overlapping into the post. Maybe it just does that on my iPad? But it seemed different than before. Reading it in the reader is better though so the page isn’t distracting. 🤷♀️
Oooooh, I wonder what’s up with that? Thank you for letting me know. Maybe I’ll remove the sidebar. I’ll check into it! Thanks again! 🙂
No worries. It works great in the reader.
That’s good. 🙂 I want it to work on my site, too. 😭 You know I’ll be working on this non-stop. 😂
I removed the sidebar which fixed the problem. Thank you again, so much, for letting me know! xoxo
Thank you, Audrey. LOL You’re just about done with her, too. hahaha I literally LOL’d.
I’m glad you can understand where Bea is coming from. You put it so well in your comment about how mothers think. It’s soooo true!
Thanks. But I think I’ve ranted about Bea’s mother before. Actually she has been through a lot in her life and I feel like she is trying to control what little she can and is pushing that same mentality out her daughter. But, yes. Enough already!
LOL I think you’re spot on with Ellie and why she is this way. Ellie is actually a character who has more story ahead of her. I hope you’ll like it. 🙂
AWWWW! Progress!!
Bea sounded SO much like Ellie when she said they had to strike while the iron is hot lol. I feel for her though. But, Perry! Dude is a solid ROCK! He is such a blessing to her.
I am SO glad Bea gave Ellie a piece of her mind cuz I would TWO SECONDS from pushing her down the stairs or something LOL.
“Baseball’s for wusses.” LOL
Thank you, Jess! 😀 Yes! I thought Bea sounded like Ellie there, too. I’m glad you said that about Perry the Rock! LOL 😀
LMBO!! You wanted to push Ellie down the stairs? Go, you! hahaha I wondered how that would go over, Bea calling Ellie “old woman” and all.
Well, I love baseball, so I don’t agree with him, but they’re brothers, so I guess they should needle each other a bit. haha
It’s no wonder this is all taking a toll on Bea, but it’s a good thing that Perry and the doctor are there to remind her not to go overboard. The scene with her brushing Kara’s hair was completely lovely, though. It was really great progress. 🙂 As for Bea shouting at Ellie… I know it’s not a great reaction, but I can’t blame her for being tired of the constant criticism.
Great chapter as always, Kym! 😀 Can’t wait for more.
Oh and it’s no wonder they chose your site for the showcase. It looks awesome as always! 🙂
Awww… Thanks, Louise. 🙂 I so agree with you about Perry and how it’s a good thing he’s there to remind her not to go overboard. Same with the doctor. lol Bea’s having such a tough time.
I’m glad you liked the part where Bea was brushing Kara’s hair. 🙂
I wondered how Bea yelling at Ellie and calling her “Old Woman” would go over. haha
When Bea started yelling at Ellie I immediately thought of Jess and how she would appreciate it. 😛
Hahahaha! That’s awesome! 😀
Poor Bea doesn’t know how to deal with all this. It’s so difficult… But Perry is right. She can’t do what she wants, but has to think of what is good for Kara. Everything done about her has to be delicate, or they might lose all the progress she’s made. I still feel so bad for her, and that she is the way she is because of Jem. He didn’t even know how much damage he’d done for her. That’s the example of putting his own good first. He wanted to be with Kara, but he didn’t care for Kara’s well-being…
Thank you, Jowita. I love what you said about how Jem didn’t realize how much damage he was causing for Kara, and how he didn’t care for her well-being. You’re right that everything they do with her has to be approached delicately. Any wrong step could cause her to lose progress.
You’re right about Bea. She doesn’t know how to deal with it. Good thing Perry can step outside the situation and see reason.