Her grandmotherβs chair creaked and groaned as she sat on the front porch for a long overdue break. The sky grew darker, indicating a storm was heading her direction. An imminent disturbance that only reminded her of the tempest twisting and blustering in her heavy heart.
The wind heaved fiercely from the west, shaking the lilac bushes by the stream that ran through her yard, raging this way and that. She closed her eyes and wondered at the power of the wind and how it blew her carefully fastened hair across her face like wild talons threatening to claw at her careworn eyes.
Thunder cracked and rolled across the heavens, but it did not startle her. Instead, she smiled with relief as the temperature dropped ten degrees. The first fat drops splattered across the front of the porch, darkening the gray, peeling paint. It was only moments before the tumultuous wind blew the rain right across her lap.
Taking a deep breath and holding it, she thought perhaps there was nothing as good as the smell of a summer rain. Yet, deep down, she knew it wasnβt true what they said about the rain. It didnβt wash away all the dirt. Instead, it left puddles and mud. And that deceivingly sweet, earthy smell.
Her grandmotherβs chair continued its creaking and groaning, although she had risen from it. She turned toward the stream now, once again closing her eyes against it all. Could she change what the rain really did? If she imagined hard enough, she might picture everything much better than it really was.
βI watched the stream turn into a waterfall, and then the water began to rise,β she murmured to no one.
In that moment, there were no puddles, no mud. Instead, the beautiful water engulfed her as it flowed over the waterfall and surrounded her in the rising depths. She fell back, letting it bury her, filling her nostrils and mouth.
At last, she was clean.
Β© Copyright 2017
booomcha.com
KL Hawke
(Updated 9/25/2023 by KL Hawke)
FYI #1: This short story first appeared on my site September 26, 2017 after I wrote it using this writing prompt: theΒ black CATastrophy Writing Prompt 08. It was later published in their magazine here: The Stream, a black CATastrophy ShortΒ Story.
FYI #2: My pseudonym used to be “Rosemary Castevet” and that is the name I used to submit my entry as that is the name I used at that time on my site here.
I cleaned up a couple sentences I wasn’t very happy with.
Thank you so much for reading, liking, lurking, and commenting!
Featured Image by George from Pixabay
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The images were perfect companions for such a beautiful short story.
Thank you so much. I’m glad to see you!πΊ
Even fierce storms can bring comfort and wash over you with memories of the past. Have a wonderful Monday Kymber. Allan
Thank you so much, Allan. Happy Monday! I hope this week finds you well.
This is a great story. It reminds me of someone that can’t get clean enough and wash away whatever haunts them. Beautiful, just beautiful!
Thank you, Belladonna. Your thoughtful words mean so much to me. π€π»πΊ
You are so welcome and I mean every word.
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Thank you for sharing!!.. looking on the light side, rain is often referred to as “cleaning” so perhaps she used the rain/water to mentally wash away of all the negative in her life.. her spirit becoming free,…. π
Hope all is well, you have the mostest wonderfulest day every day and until we meet again….
May the sun shine all day long
Everything go right, nothing go wrong
May those you love bring love back to you
And may all the wishes you wish come true
May your troubles be less
Your blessings be more
And nothing but happiness
Come through your door
(Irish Saying)
Thank you so much, Dutch. You make an excellent point!
Everything is good here; I hope you and yours are well. π
A smooth, flowing story with an unexpected ending!
Thank you so much, Carol. That is really kind of you.
Whoa. That gave me chills, Kymber. So beautifully described and atmospheric (both literally and figuratively). You left the character mor open to interpretation than the landscape, which I loved. It let the story reveal itself slowly and flow easily into the tragic end. Nice!
Thank you so much, Diana. π I’m so glad you liked it. π€π»πΊ
I loved it!
I’m so glad. π€π»πΊ
That’s so evocative
Thank you so much. You are kind.
Hi Kymber. Your story swept me right in with the storm. Evocative prose. Lovely. <3
Thank you so much for your kind words. You’re so encouraging. π xo
Hugs xx
Hugs xo
Very atmospheric Kymber and I felt her pain… xx
Thank you so much, Sally. I’m so glad you popped in. π
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So visceral, Kymber. Your intensity is shown in the turbulent weather and the grandmother’s thoughts. Beautifully written!
Thank you so much, Jacquie. I’m so glad you enjoyed it. π
I love the sensory descriptions, so Bert powerful. This was beautifully written. Such a massive punch in a little package. I was right there with this character and felt her pain. Great job, my dear friend. π€
Thank you so much, Nise. I’m so glad you liked this little snippet of a story. xoxo
The descriptive scene setting put me there on the porch with the character. Although it turned a bit dark, it’s a fantastic story of surrender!
Thank you so much, Jan. I’m afraid so much of my writing turns dark. I never plan it that way. I do not know why that happens. lol
We have to go where the story leads.
That’s true, you’re right.
An interesting switch from real rain to imagined waterfall. So was that an imagined drowning-?
Thank you so much, Jonathan. π I guess I left that open for interpretation. π
THERE YA GO! π
I loved how you brought us into the story. with your descriptions of the scene. Good job, Kymber
Thank you so much, John. π
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That’s a powerful short story. So imaginative and masterfully written. It’s amazing that you can pack a punch with such a short story.
Thank you so much, Thomas. I really appreciate your encouragement.
Beautifully written, Kymber! I like the nonspecific ending.
Thank you so much, Miriam. I appreciate your kind words. π€π»πΊ
You’re welcome, Kymber! Nicely written! <3 π
π πΊ
Powerful.
Thank you so much, Gorilla. π
WOW Kymber, this is so powerful, yet so tragic. You can gather different versions of grandmother becoming untethered by what image was in her mind that would have been burdensome, whether life/death, or soul-cleansing. What a heartwarming short, short my friend. π€ππ
Thank you so much, chickie! π€π»πΊ I was literally on my front porch in an old rocking chair when it started to rain. Something came over me, and I ran inside and typed the first draft like a mad woman. lol I’m so glad you liked it.
Now Kymber darling, talk about inspiration! I love that! π There is nothing like a rain shower to inspire a mad woman with a keyboard! LOL π€£π»βπΌππ Keep drafting dear heart.
Right? LOL I quite agree! π
You, too, my dear Kym. xoxo
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Blessings and thanks for another great as usual article. May the day bring you all that’s good !
Thank you so much! I wish you the same. xo
I love the descriptions in this piece. It’s very thought-provoking as the ending can have multiple different explanations. For me, she was someone who sinned a lot in the past and her sins wouldn’t leave her like the dirt in those puddles but she wanted to be cleansed of them.
Thank you so much! π€π»πΊ I like your interpretation a lot. And I really appreciate your encouragement. π
Beautiful and sadβ¦
Thank you so much, Anon. π€π»πΊ
There is a refreshing calm to that story, despite Nature’s violence. Nicely written.
Thank you, Jacqui. I appreciate your kind words.
This is a well written story from your long past. It seems a shame though because it sounds like the old lady drowned. I’m thinking she either got washed away in the waterfall or she is so lost in her own thoughts that her dream became her reality.
Thank you so much, JC. I love your thoughts on the ending, and leave that open for interpretation. π
OOOOH. Okay. You got me hooked…again
LOL Oh dear. π π
Wow, I was reading and thinking, “What a great writer she is!” so I’m glad it was recognized and published. I’m going to check out the magazine now too.
Thank you so much for your kind words, Maryanne. π€π»πΊ I hope you enjoy the magazine.
It’s really cool. I “followed.”
That’s awesome! π