Chapter 9.28: Dear Diary, a Heart Breaks

From the Diary of Amy Noble:

Dear Diary, I read all the diary pages my mother gave to me and they filled me with dread. If I expected a story full of sunshine and rainbows, much like my own childhood had been, I was sorely disappointed. Within the first few pages, I saw my biological mother (Gigi) fall into my father’s (Laris’s) deadly trap.

Gigi and my mom’s father Kai had died suddenly from a motorcycle accident when they were still children. Instead of receiving the support they needed from their mother, Jade, she sent them off to boarding school where they hardly ever saw each other.

It seems Gigi was a bit of a smart-ass, but that didn’t alienate her. Instead, she made lots of friends, one in particular named Tilly. Tilly was a troubled young girl, but she and Gigi became fast friends with Tilly conducting several sneaky missions for Gigi. No doubt if they had caught Tilly, she would have been expelled from school. Perhaps that’s what she wanted. We’ll never know.

As time went on, Gigi realized she had certain powers, and it was during that time she met my biological father, Laris Bloodgood. From Gigi’s descriptions, it didn’t take a genius to understand he was up to no good. But almost at once, he had her under his spell.

He promised Gigi if she followed his direction and honed her powers, Kai would return and they would finally be the family she’d always imagined.

Every time I read Laris’s name, I cringed and an icy chill crept down my back, making me shudder. The thought of him parenting me was almost more than I could bear. But I also knew if I didn’t get a grip on this and act normally, my mom would regret giving me the diary to read. She was anguished enough as it was. What if she thought it was more than I could handle, so she shut me out altogether? I needed to know everything, and she was the only one who could fill me in. Even Sebastian (my adoptive dad) couldn’t tell me everything. Not like Mom could.

Reading further, I couldn’t believe how paranoid and confused Gigi was. In fact, as time went on, it seemed worse and worse. Oh, and I didn’t even mention she was expecting me any time.

My mom was only a teenager, with Sebastian as her bodyguard. He used to be a vampire, but I’ve talked about that before, so I won’t touch on that too much in this entry. My hand is cramping from writing so much.

But I have to get it all down because keeping it in my head… well, it’s too heavy.

After a time, Mom began to get through to Gigi, but Gigi still believed her father would return. About then, I was born and Mom was the one who took care of me, because Gigi was too ill mentally to handle taking care of a newborn.

That’s when I read about the showdown between Laris and Gigi. She won, but both their lives were taken in an enormous explosion. Dad saved Sophie and me just before a tremendous burst of flames claimed my biological parents, the house, and everything in it.

From then on, Mom cared for me as her own even though she was just a kid herself. Dad became human with Grandfather’s help, and Grandfather began spelling me so I wouldn’t remember anything.

What freaked me out the most was how afraid everyone was that I would use my powers by accident and kill them all. I mean, how do you live with that?

I hate what I am. Most of all, I hate how scared they all are of me.

Grandfather is the only one who can help me learn to control whatever it is I have.

From the Diary of Amy Noble:

Dear Diary, Harlow’s recent visit asking to talk to me was too painful to think about or even write down.

But if I’m to be heir and the author of my own diary, I must include everything that shapes my life. This definitely influenced me.

So much had happened lately, I didn’t want to talk to Harlow about what happened that night at my house. Instead, I suggested we take a swim.

As was our custom, both of us had swimsuits on underneath our clothes. As she pulled her attire off, I kept my eyes down, staring at my feet as I also removed my shirt.

It wasn’t until later, when we were treading water, that I dared to look at her.

“I went to your house first, then your mom told me you were here with your grandfather,” Harlow said.

I nodded. “I just thought I’d stay with him for a while. What did you want to talk to me about?” My voice sounded calm, like it was coming from someone else.

“I’m worried about what happened the other night.”

That was all she said. Was she worried that she might be gay? If that was the case, she wasn’t alone.

“You’re worried about your feelings?” I asked, darting her another glance.

Confusion crossed her eyes before she answered.

“No, I’m worried Tom might find out. I don’t want to lose him. What happened between us was… I don’t know… strange.”

Gulping hard, I put a hand to my heart. Could she see how her words cut me to the bone?

“What do you mean, strange?”

Harlow looked like she might answer me, but, she swam to shore, gathering up her clothes. Slowly, I swam to shore, too, picking up my clothes, my eyes full of unshed tears that I swallowed back.

Between finding out I was a freak of nature and Harlow distancing herself, I’d never felt so lonely in my life.

The dry heat as we walked back up to the house dried our skin and bathing suits. Once we were inside, we dressed again and Harlow followed me to the kitchen. My intention was to delay her leaving by getting us both cans of pop. I thought maybe we could talk after all.

“You just don’t understand,” she said, throwing her hands up.

“I want to,” I answered. “I really do.”

“I don’t know what happened the other night. Something came over me, but it meant nothing. It was just something that happened. Amy, I don’t think we can be friends anymore.”

A dizziness came over me as I shook my head, not believing what I was hearing.

“I’m sorry, I don’t want things to be this way, but after that night, I know what your feelings are for me, and I can’t have that.”

My thoughts were spinning and I couldn’t speak. It was as if something inside me was breaking.

“You don’t know how sorry I am.”

Nausea overtook me, and I held back the urge to wretch.

“How can you do this?” I choked out.

“It isn’t easy, but you have to understand that I’m not like you and I never will be.”

She was actually pointing at me as if I’d hurt her, but it was I who was the damaged party. This would not soon be forgotten.

From the Diary of Sophie Woodbury-Noble:

Dear Diary, I scrubbed my hands for the millionth time that day as I thought about Amy and what she must be going through.

She called me earlier, and what she said took me by surprise, but really, in the end, it was no big deal.

“First off, I’m gay,” she’d said.

“Okaaaaay, and?”

There was a long pause before she finally said, “And I was crushing on Harlow. We kissed but now she’s saying she isn’t gay, doesn’t have feelings for me, and that we can’t be friends anymore.”

Amy’s words tumbled out of her in a way I wasn’t accustomed to, which clued me in to how upset she really was.

“Oh, Darling, I’m so sorry this all happened.”

We talked for a long while until Gerrard interrupted us to give Amy another lesson in magic. She quickly made her goodbyes and hung up.

I bit the inside of my lip until it bled. Gerrard’s timing couldn’t have been any worse.

“What’s wrong, Soph?” Seb said.

I hadn’t realized he’d come into the room, so I jumped a little at the sound of his voice. Telling him everything that happened on our phone call, I finally turned off the water, located the dish towel, and dried my hands.

“That asshole,” I fumed. “I’m so tired of him.”

A gentle breeze made the open door creak, and I lifted my face to it. Then I turned back to my husband.

“And honestly, Seb, I don’t know how you can stand Gerrard’s presence in our lives after what he did to you.”

“That was centuries ago,” he cracked. Then his face became serious. “I know he’s difficult to take sometimes, and I understand you don’t get my relationship with him. It’s too complicated for me to understand, let alone you. But he really is trying to help Amy right now. He couldn’t spell her for her entire life.”

“Why not?” I demanded, pushing a lock of my unruly red hair behind my ear even though I knew it wouldn’t stay there. “If he has to be in our lives, why the hell couldn’t he just spell her forever? It’s not like he won’t be around her entire life!”

Seb shrugged slightly, resting his thumb in his belt.

“He’s sworn to protect her, so that is what he will do. Vampires take that sort of thing very seriously.”

I sighed. “I can’t believe we’re having this conversation.”

From the Diary of Amy Noble:

Dear Diary, Grandfather wanted me to practice my so-called magic, but all I could think about was how Harlow had treated me. Slowly, I felt a bubbling underneath my skin, just barely simmering, and my muscles quivered.

Grandfather seemed rather pleased with my state of mind.

“The anger you’re feeling… you need to harness that and concentrate on what you are doing. It will come.”

“I feel ridiculous in this outfit.”

A smile tore at the corner of his mouth.

“You are a queen where I come from, my dear. These garments are a testament to your station in life. You must dress the part to feel the part. Now concentrate.”

Closing my eyes, I couldn’t ignore the irritability I felt at Harlow’s dismissal. We couldn’t be friends because we shared a kiss? I wasn’t even certain she was being truthful with herself.

Gripping the crystal ball in my hands, I thought about how she swam with me in that bikini of hers, expecting me not to stare at her. How could she act so normal, then tell me I’m dirt beneath her shoes?

I wanted to scream, to rail at the world for the unfairness I felt. What would I do about it?

What was I going to do about Harlow and how she treated me?

I am not a loser! I refuse to be an outcast just because Harlow says I am!

Who is she?

My pulse quickened, and my heart thumped against my chest. She was no one!

Suddenly, a beam of light flew across the room and blew a hole right through some of Grandfather’s books. They fell to the floor with a giant blow.

“What was that?”

Grandfather stood there with a smirk on his face as he answered.

“That was you finally focusing and blowing a hole in the enemy!”

All at once, it dawned on me. I have powers, and could very well be the most powerful being in the world. It was then I realized I needed to put my full effort into my lessons with Grandfather.

After all… I was a queen.

Added into the pages of Sebastian Woodbury’s Journals:

He waited until his keen vampire hearing detected Amy was upstairs, in her room, with the door shut before he dialed the phone.

Someone picked up, but there was only silence.

“She is ready,” was all he said to the party on the other side.

Special thanks to Bee (Stories by Bee / Poses by Bee) for the poses used in this chapter: Spiritual Ceremony and Convo/Emotion Poses – Set 2.

I wish all our Canadian friends a happy Thanksgiving on Monday!

Thank you so much for reading, liking, lurking, and commenting!



Other Credits:
World: Winchester Farming Community
Lot: Woodland Cottage, Hill House