Chapter 9.20: Dear Diary, a Forever Home

》Content Warning:
one “f-bomb.”《

Dear Diary, the first thing we did after Amy’s kidnapping and recovery was to go home and begin packing our bags. We didn’t even have to speak about it as we hurried to gather our most important documents and belongings. It was as if Sebastian and I were of a like mind, only concerned about getting our child out of there.

You see, Amy had shown incredible powers, and who is to say she is not profoundly more powerful than either of her parents put together?

People will want her, some of them thinking they are protecting her, and others for more dubious reasons. Because Amy’s mother, my sister, had been used right from the start. I would never allow Amy to be used like Gigi was. It would be over my dead body that this should happen to my little girl.

I watched Amy as she picked out her two favorite stuffies, carrying one in her arms, and placing the other in her backpack with her pajamas, toiletries, and clothes enough for a few days. Most children would have had a dozen questions or more, but she was silent as she kissed her stuffed bunny before pushing it into the bag. It was as if she knew she was unusual and must be immediately moved.

“That’s a good girl,” I murmured as I zipped the pack closed and slung it over my shoulder. “We’ll see Miss Bunny Whiskers once we get settled again.”

She nodded slightly and tried to smile, but it fell short.

My heart was racing, but I forced myself to sound reassuring. “You don’t need to worry about anything because we will let nothing happen to you again. I’m so sorry about Tilly.”

That’s when the child provided me with a too-bright smile and took my hand. That smile and her next words left me with a chill I still even now haven’t been able to shake.

She said, “I’m not worried, Mommy. See what I did to Tilly? She was bad and now I won’t be bothered by her again.”

An enormous lump filled my throat as I nodded in agreement. Was Amy really aware that she had killed Tilly? And if she was… well, was she a little psycho that I should fear? I would never hurt Amy, but could I trust her to perceive all my actions as benign? What if she had a fit of temper after being told “no?”

With pulse pounding, we stopped by my room to grab my suitcase, then rushed downstairs to meet Sebastian in the foyer. When he smiled at me, even though it was an obviously fake smile, it reminded me of how angry I was with him.

But there was no time for any of the feelings that tried their best to bubble to the surface. During these tenuous moments, I needed to keep my cool so we could focus on the most important thing.

And that was to safely get us to the Veiled Islands, where Gerrard had a castle of some sort. Sebastian had never been there, but he assured me supernaturals did not overrun it. Instead, it was a small group of three land-tied islands, each connected to one another by a sandy isthmus called a tombolo, inhabited by people who wanted to remain unconnected to the outside world.

The three islands were called, from largest to smallest, Cadwe, Endon (where Gerrard’s castle was), and Flatcroft. Together they made up the Veiled Islands, which were hidden by a spell Gerrard had fashioned for circumstances such as what we were facing.

It would be a long trip, but when we finally arrived by small plane from the mainland, I could sigh from relief. At least for now, Amy would be safe and we could figure out what to do.

There was so much I wanted to speak to Sebastian about, but even after two days of living in Endon, I hadn’t had the chance.

Then one morning, when Amy and I entered the great room, we seemed to have interrupted a heated discussion happening between Seb and Gerrard.

“-it was a mistake!” Seb hissed, his voice urgent.

Gerrard’s eyes were on his “son.” He relaxed his expression as he said, “I’m sorry, but you made your-” then he saw me and Amy, and his voice trailed off.

Sebastian saw Gerrard looking over his shoulder, so turned around, startled to see us there.

“I need to speak to you privately,” I told him.

“Yes, of course,” Seb answered, his voice formal and stiff.

He wipes his sweaty palms on his pants, then followed me into the expansive kitchen.

Since it was the first time Amy wasn’t in earshot, I started right in.

“I’ve wanted to ask you for days now… What kind of arrangement did you have with Tilly? She said all she ever did was everything you asked of her. What the hell, Sebastian? What was that? Why the fuck was she so vengeful that she kidnapped our daughter?”

He put his hands to his temples, and that was when I realized, as the fit of words tumbled out of my mouth, they’d also risen in pitch until I was practically shrieking. I took a deep breath and a step back.

“What was that all about?”

He pressed his eyes closed as if in agony.

“I never thought she’d-” he choked out, then stopped. Taking a moment, he started again. “I thought I’d seen and heard the last of her. But I was so wrong. I can’t tell you how sorry I am, Soph.”

“What happened?”

“I needed Tilly’s help. After speaking with Gerrard about the Plumbob of Wishes, it became clear that neither of us could wield its power against Constance because of a pack made with her clan years and years ago. Tilly had no such pact with that clan, so I turned her.”

My eyes widened, and I gasped. “Wtf, Sebastian? Why would you give her that kind of power, and why wasn’t she beholden to the pact if you sired her?”

“Yes, she was sired by me, but she was never initiated into our clan, so she was not indebted to their pact.” He looked like he was holding back tears, which melted my heart a slight bit, but I was still seething with anger. “I needed Tilly to get rid of Constance. In return, Gerrard promised to return me to my human state. You see, I knew that once I became human again, Tilly would also be turned human with no possible way to become a vampire again. I didn’t think she would seek us out the way she did.”

“Well, she did. I can’t tell you how furious I am with you.”

“It doesn’t matter because it cannot be worse than how I feel about myself at the moment.”

“Thank you for allowing me to come with you and Amy to the beach,” Seb said.

I dug my foot further into the warm sand, relishing the sight of Amy carefree as she paddled around the water. She didn’t seem to be affected at all by what should definitely have traumatized her.

“It was either asking you if you wanted to come or explain to Amy why we’re at such odds with one another right now. I’m still angry.”

“I know,” he said, his voice sober. “I’m not asking you to forget the crimes I’ve committed, only that you… that you try to understand why I did what I did.”

“Oh, I understand.” Then I sighed, putting my hands on my hips. “Honestly, I’m really pissed, but I can’t think of anything I would have done differently. You’ve lived a completely different life than me, and I’m sure you’ve had happiness snatched from right before your eyes more than I realize.”

We waded into the water, and I continued, “The fact is, I didn’t have much of a childhood where I could act like a child. I don’t want that for Amy. And that means not always making the easiest decisions to protect her. But we have to do better, Seb. The both of us do.”

“I understand. I don’t know how I’ll ever forgive myself for letting her get taken like that.”

I looked him in the eye then. “You have to forgive yourself or you will be of no use to us at all.” Wishing I could stew in my infuriation, I stopped to think. Try as I might to imagine every path this part of our lives might lead us down, under no circumstances could I not afford to pardon Sebastian. Sighing, it became clear that we had to start this part of our lives over, if we were to find any happiness at all. “I propose we put this behind us. The islands are pleasant, and the people are friendly. We have every modern convenience here, and there are other children for Amy to meet and play with. I know this isn’t paradise, but it’s practically invisible to the outside world. We need to start over and make this good.”

He seemed to relax a little as I spoke, and we meandered to the dock where our legs dried in just a few brief minutes from the heat.

“Can we make this good?” he asked me at last.

After a moment of reflection regarding our situation and how long it might take my massive inheritance to transfer to the private bank on Cadwe, I finally nodded. “Yes, but I do not want to live with Gerrard or in that creepy castle.”

He smiled for the first time in days, although his eyes still spoke of exhaustion. “I’ll inquire about properties for sale.”

The next few days were a flurry of house hunting, shopping for island-friendly clothing, securing my funds so they would not be traced, and enrolling Amy in school. Gerrard hadn’t been enthused about us moving out of his ghastly castle.

“Will I still see the child?” he asked, his reflective eyes darting between Sebastian and me. “It seems to me having a grandfather would not hurt her.”

“If you can behave yourself with those fangs,” I said, a partial smile touching my eyes.

“And if you never hurt her in any way, including slapping or hitting her,” Sebastian said with no smile at all.

“Nevermind,” Gerrard huffed, his chin rising into the air, and folding his arms in front of his chest. “I don’t even like the repugnant little thing.”

I smiled at Seb, knowing Gerrard was already besotted, having seen it with my own eyes. Still, both Seb and I planned to make sure Amy was never alone with him. At least at first.

And that’s how things went until, several nights in a row, I awoke without Sebastian at my side.

Wandering downstairs, I found him stretched on a couch in a random sitting room.

“Oh, hey,” he said when his eyes caught mine.

“Look, if this is about our fight when we first got here, I really wanted us to put that in the past. We have an entire future to look to.”

He sighed. “I’m sorry for brooding so much. There are some things on my mind.”

Sitting next to him on the couch, he put his hand on my leg and gave me a half-hearted smile.

“What’s going on?”

“I asked Gerrard to turn me back.”

Gasping, and before I realized I was even going to, I punched him in the shoulder. He winced and rubbed his shoulder, saying, “Ow.”

“What kind of stupid thought is that? You went through everything you did so you could be with me! Do you really think I want to marry a vampire?”

He sat up, pulling me into his arms. “If I hadn’t been human, I could have protected my family. I was helpless when Tilly held a knife to your throat, and the three vampire goons she had threatened you and Amy with. If I hadn’t been human, she wouldn’t have had a reason for coming after us at all. I made such a mess out of things.”

Touching his face with my fingertips, I looked him in the eyes. “Remember what I said about forgiving yourself? You need to find a way to do that. I love you, and I want this crazy little family we have. Don’t throw everything we’ve fought for away because of regrets and fears.”

His hand snaked behind the nape of my neck, pulling my lips to his.

It wasn’t before long, all those regrets and fears I spoke of were truly forgotten.

An Afterward to the Chapter…

It was on the smallest of the Veiled Islands, Flatcroft, where we found our forever home.

Thank you, Bee (Stories by Bee / Poses by Bee) for making the poses I used in this chapter: Just Standing, Adult Argument, Janice’s Poses, Travel Poses, and Convo/Emotion Poses – Set 2. Bee’s poses made especially for me: Amy’s Poses for Kymber (used in picture #1).

Thank you for reading, lurking, liking, and commenting,



Other Credits:
World: Winchester Farming Community
Lots: Hill House, Woodland Cottage