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Saturday, September 21, 2024
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Chapter 6.2: Dear Diary, Crazy Talk

Dear Diary, I had a lot to think about as the sun rose this morning over the ocean. While I took the trash to the garbage pail outside, I killed a few minutes’ time watching the water. Jem was still sleeping and the last thing I wanted to do was face him before I had more time to myself to process what happened.

In doing so, I resisted the urge to slap myself in the forehead. Since he’d shown up the night before, I’d been sucked in by a whirlwind of drama that threatened to turn my entire life upside down like a tornado.  Was I ready for this?

And, what was this?

We’d slept together, that’s what. He kissed me and right after that, well, I lost my mind. Our lovemaking had been immediate, not something planned or thought about ahead of time. As if possessed, we couldn’t get out of our clothes fast enough. It was like all the years we’d been teenage friends had built up to this hedonic moment of desire.

He said he loved me.

Being in his arms reminded me how much I missed the familiarity of him. The baritone timbre of his voice when he spoke my name, his hot breath on my neck as he leaned in to find my lips, the spicy scent of his aftershave that tickled my nose.

Jem was frowning when I finally came back inside.

“You don’t have any food,” he said.

“Oh, uh, yeah. I wasn’t expecting company.”

“I was going to cook breakfast for you. I wanted to spoil you with one of my new recipes.”

“I’ll guess we’ll have to grab something out.”

I didn’t want to spend the money on a meal out, but I thought it was the least I could do considering he’d come such a long way to see me.

“Or,” he said as he turned toward me, “we could go to the market. I could pick up what I need and make something nice for you. I’m buying, what do you say?”

He must have seen the hesitation in my eyes because he frowned again. I couldn’t help it, though, when he talked about grocery shopping, it made me wonder how long he was staying. Which is wrong-not to mention rude-when someone’s professed their undying love and proven it, too.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

I was so afraid of hurting his feelings, I couldn’t answer.

When I didn’t answer, he said, “Oh. I guess we should talk.”

“I guess so.” I couldn’t stop the heat from filling my cheeks as he stared at me with expectation.

There was this huge, uncomfortable weight in the air as we each waited for the other to say something. After what seemed several minutes we both let out little, anxious laughs.

“I don’t remember ever having trouble talking to you before,” I mumbled.

Was it stuffy in here? I unlocked a window and struggled a moment to open it, closing my eyes as the salty ocean air caressed my face. I’d be fine after a few cleansing breaths.

Right?

“Bea, I know I came here without warning and told you something you may not have been expecting to hear. What I want you to know is, I meant it. I love you.”

There it was. He said it again.

“You’re not saying anything.”

He was observant that way.

I knew what he wanted to hear. Why was it so difficult for me? I was sure I felt the same way about him but the words didn’t come easily. Maybe I was thinking about it too hard. Or perhaps I was still shocked by the entire episode of the night before.

“I love you, too,” I said even though there was still some hesitation. The truth was, I’d always loved Jem. We’d been best friends since we were toddlers. During all those firsts and milestone moments in my life, he was there. Doesn’t that in itself form a life-long bond between two people?

Yes, my love for Jem filled my heart as surely as any other emotion when I regarded him. Was it the type of love I ruminated on when I was a teenage girl? Romantic and electric? Being with Jem intimately had left me confused but once I pushed that aside, I could taste the excitement he brought to my otherwise dull life. I could make this work because I knew him. He was comfortable and familiar.

A relieved smile spread across his face, lighting up his eyes and the entire room. If I could always make him that happy with what seemed such a small thing, if he was that easy to please, maybe he was right for me. Jem had always hinted we’d end up together even though we didn’t date each other in high school.

There was always this attraction between us neither of us could deny. Because of our parents, we only ever kissed once. It seemed weird to us at the time to explain things to them and possibly meet with their disapproval. Besides, we were going in different directions after graduation. What was the point of starting anything up long term?

“What are we?” I asked, my head dizzy as we continued our conversation at the summer festival.

“What d’you mean?”

His smile was contagious. I could feel my mouth curving upward as our eyes met.

“Are we officially dating? What’s our status?”

“This isn’t Facebook,” he laughed. “We don’t need a status. We’re just… in love. Let’s enjoy it without analyzing it to death.”

Was it as simple as that? I hoped so.

The day was the most beautiful I’d ever experienced. I didn’t think I was one to lose my head, yet, I couldn’t help but get caught up with Jem. Soon, we found ourselves at one of Sunlit Tides’ many beaches. All at once, I wanted to throw my arms up in the air and praise this day for being so glorious!

Never had I seen such brilliant colors, or the sun shone so brightly! The smell of the ocean air was exhilarating! I hoped our love would always feel this way.

I laughed as Jem swung me by my waist in a swooping circle.

“I love you, Bea!” he shouted for the world to hear.

“I love you, Jem!” I shrieked as he swung me around again.

Then he was serious as he gazed down at me.

“Will you love me forever?” he asked.

“Oh, yes,” I gushed, “I could never love anyone else.”

“Then, marry me,” he said.

My heart caught in my throat and my pulse quickened.

“You-you want to get engaged?”

“No, I want to get married.”

It was another minute or two before the gravity of what he said hit me full force. I think my jaw dropped a few inches because he playfully lifted it with two of his fingers until it was closed.

“You mean now?”

“No, tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? Like tomorrow tomorrow?” 

“C’mon, Bea,” he laughed, kissing my neck.

I tried to push him away and give this serious thought but he already knew my neck weakness. While I wanted to resist and tell him this was crazy talk, something about the idea was captivating as well.

“Bea…” he said as he nibbled at my tender flesh. “Marry me tomorrow, Bea… Marry me…”

When I couldn’t take anymore, I began laughing and pushing him away for real.

“All right, all right!”

“Yes?”

His grin was magical and I found myself with the same expression despite any doubts I may have.

“Yes!”

“You don’t think this is too fast?”

He took my hand, caressing my fingers with his thumb. “No, I mean, come on. We’ve known each other our whole lives. I’ve known for years I love you. I was only hoping you loved me, too, and wanted the same thing.”

His words had some kind of effect on me. My heart was overflowing with the kind of swelling emotion only someone in my situation can have. As my mind tried to weigh the pros and cons, something in me wanted to jump in feet first because he was willing to do that, too.

“We will be happy, baby, I promise.”

As soon as he called me baby, I could hear Aunt Rosetta’s voice in my head telling me how degrading and repugnant that was.

“Jem?”

“Huh?”

“Don’t call me baby.”

“You got it, my treasure!”

Laughing, I swatted him in the shoulder.

“What? It’s better than chicken!”

“Is it, though?” I asked.

He responded with a tender kiss and happiness in his eyes.

 

“Perla! I’d like you to meet my best friend in all the world.”

She glanced up from where she was planting seeds in the garden and smiled at Jem. “Oh, you must be Jem.”

A proud smile spread across my face as my two friends introduced themselves and shook hands.

“Bea Darling has told me so much about you. It’s so nice you could come for a visit. How do you like the island?”

“It’s the most beautiful place I think I’ve ever been,” he said.

“Isn’t it, though? I used to live in Bridgeport many years ago, don’t you know, and the pollution in the air was ghastly! When I retired, I moved to Sunlit Tides and I haven’t looked back.”

“I don’t blame you,” he said. “In fact, after the wedding, we’ll definitely continue living here.”

My back stiffened when Jem spilled our news the way he did. I wanted to tell her, don’t get me wrong… but not like that.

“The wedding?” Perla asked, her eyes darting from one of us to the other.

“We decided to get married,” I said.

“Oh! What a surprise! An island wedding? Those can be so beautiful. Let’s see, I think that spot on the peninsula would be perfect, Darling.”

“It would except, well, we’re doing it tomorrow. We stopped to get the wedding license before coming home,” I said.

I didn’t know what I expected when I told her. With a deliberate slowness, she removed her glasses and cleaned them with the corner of her shirt. I recognized this as the equivalent of taking out the trash this morning to kill time.

When she finally graced us with her attention, her mouth was tilted into a forced smile. “Tomorrow, Darling? I mean, really.”

“Yes, tomorrow. We’ve already decided on it,” Jem said.

Perla took that moment to look at me instead. “Do your parents know?”

“I haven’t had a chance to tell them. You’re the first person we’ve told.”

“And what do you think their reaction would be?”

When I thought about my parents, small doubts about what I was doing crept into my brain. They weren’t enough to deter me, only things I knew I should take the time to consider. At that moment, I didn’t want to consider them simply because Perla’s question had rankled me.

“I couldn’t say,” I said with a stubborn edge in my voice. “I suppose they’ll have questions.”

Her eyes softened at my harsh words. It was clear she didn’t want an argument. Besides, it wasn’t her place to correct me anyway.

“I suppose they will,” she said, her voice not betraying any worry she may have felt. “Please do tell them right away.”

“Yes, of course, I will,” I said, although the thought had me shaking in my shoes.

I’d never feared my parents. They’d never given me any reason to be frightened of them. I’d also never told them anything like this before.

“You know, Darling, I eloped with my fourth husband and there was so much we didn’t discuss beforehand. Are you sure you don’t want to wait?”

“I’m sure,” I said as I sneaked a smile at Jem.

Perla turned toward Jem and fired questions at him like a pro.

“Where will you work?”

“I start at the Tropical Tulip Bistro in two weeks.”

“You do?” Perla and I asked in unison.

Once again, a grin spread across his face. “Yep, I applied weeks ago for the Sous Chef position. Someday, I will be the Executive Chef. But until then, I’m happy to be Chef Lavernus Shrimpton’s right-hand man.”

“Well, that’s wonderful!” I said.

“So, you planned on eloping before you came here,” Perla said.

“Indeed,” he said. “I’ve been hoping for a long time Bea would take this crazy adventure with me.”

I was thinking Perla would react with a sentence or two about how “crazy” this was. Instead, she surprised me yet again.

“Do you plan on living here?” she asked.

My heart dropped like a crashing elevator. What if she didn’t want us here? What would we do? I would also miss her so much.

“I guess we could look for an apartment or something,” I said.

She took my hand and squeezed it. “That is not what I meant, my dear. As I’ve always said before, you’re welcome to stay here as long as you want. I was concerned about the tight living quarters. There’s no proper kitchen or bedroom…”

“I think it will be all right for now as long as you don’t mind, Jem.”

He looked at me like a puppy looks at their favorite person. “I don’t mind for a while.”

“Then it’s settled! Tomorrow, we’ll begin a new life together!”

“That’s wonderful, dear,” Perla mumbled. Then, as she started walking toward her house, “I must put more lipstick on, I can tell it’s fading.”

She was a strange, sweet woman, but I loved her.

Jem pulled me into his arms. “Shall we go call our parents?”

A shudder overtook me before I could answer. “Oh, hell, no.”

 

 

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Kymber Hawke
Kymber Hawkehttps://booomcha.com/
I am a simmer, Rennie garb wearer, author, and dog petter. Judy Garland is my queen, horror movies & classic movies are my jam. A little bit eccentric, owned by cats. 🐱🐱🐱

62 COMMENTS

  1. Oh no 😮 This is all far too sudden, Bea is too practical and sensible to rush into a marriage — that’s if she wasn’t so caught up by this initial honeymoon whirlwind of emotions. She’s already having doubts, so I think those will expand hundredfold once a week or even a few days pass. Jem is being super pushy about getting married, it’s odd, and I’m not liking it all. I feel like Bea is jumping into a very bad situation here…

    • Thank you so much, Lila. ❤️ It’s so good to see you. I believe you are right about Bea there. Hopefully, this doesn’t make her life a big mess.

  2. Oh dear. I have such a bad feeling about this all. Bea doesn’t seem to be able to say no to Jem and I’m worried he might turn into controlling jealous guy. Her doubts should be a warning enough. I can see how this could spiral into a disaster. He will likely talk her into having a baby too to ensure she’s even more bound to him. Then she’ll probably meet someone with whom she’s going to feel all the sparkles she doesn’t feel with Jem. I think they are just good friends and she confuses friendship with love. I hope I’m wrong, but I’m probably not as this gen has only started and the generations usually don’t start with a wedding but end with it.🙂 Anyhow, I’m curious how this crazy plan of theirs ends. Bea’s mom will flip.

  3. Uh oh! I think they’re making a huge mistake! It’s one thing to indulge in the heat of the moment and jump into bed together, but marriage is a very, very big step. You don’t just do that in the heat of the moment and expect things to be all sunshine and flowers. She should listen to those little doubts she’s having and slow it way down. They may have been best friends growing up, but you really don’t know someone until you live with them. These two are jumping into a world of trouble, if you ask me. And besides, if it really doesn’t work out, it will destroy their friendship as well. Not cool at all!

    • I don’t think you’re wrong for seeing this as a huge mistake. Bea isn’t listening to her doubts at all, or Perla either. You’re so right how you don’t truly know someone till you live with them. This is most likely a recipe for disaster.

  4. Why I am not surprised of this wedding? Your characters are often took rush decisions anyways and they lead us in a kind of balance.
    And do not follow aunt Rosetta she’s not true about everything.

  5. Hiii Kymber! 😀 I am so sorry for not commenting for so long – but I’m finally back and ready to dive (get it?! Lol) into Bea’s story, finally! 😉
    Weeell…. that was unexpected! I don’t think I quite like it to be honest. Just because these two were friends before, and they happen to also like each other romantically, doesn’t mean that they could make a marriage work… and why is Jem so desperate to rush it? Clingy is the lightest word to describe him right now… I really hope they won’t regret this decision!
    You know, I had to laugh at Bea’s hesitation to grab a bit outside due to her frugal trait, lmao! I love little details like that <3

  6. Yeah, I’m not so sure about this. Just because you’ve loved someone as a friend for years doesn’t mean you will love them romantically. Bea seems to have doubts, and I don’t like how pushy he was being, even if it was in a playful way.

    They need time to figure out if they would be good partners, or even roommates. If Jem loves her so much, he should have given her time to think. I can’t wait to see how Holden and Ellie react to this.

    • You have an excellent point there. If you love someone there is no rush; if they need more time, you understand and give them that. As for Holden and Ellie, oh boy! That will not go over well, especially if they sense her doubt.

  7. Oh God. My main thought is just NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
    I can see how Bea has talked herself into it, but if you question the sort of love you have, that’s a sure sign. I think, anyway, I’ve never personally felt the need to marry someone the day after I ran into them XD

  8. Wh…… Whaaaaa?????

    ^ That was my entire reaction to this chapter lol. Bea, listen to that inner hesitation! This isn’t going to work out if they haven’t discussed things beforehand. Oh dear, what did they just get into…

  9. Oh my gosh I have so so so much to say here but I am going to keep it short so I don’t give anything away. I loved this chapter. Not because she gave in with his plan, but you see so much. Bea’s very strong personality, his neediness, her doubts, and ….well, I so want to say what I really think! But I can’t! I will say, what on earth happened in his life that all of a sudden he thinks, oh after 2 years I’m in love with Bea and I should go find her? ! No no no, cmon buddy! It’s not sexy to come on that strong..all you look is desperate and lonely.

    • LOL Jem does look desperate and lonely, doesn’t he? What happened indeed? Bea really needs to take a step back and look at this situation with that intuition she’s been ignoring.

      I’m so glad you love this chapter. And I’m so glad you were able to edit it. 😀 I wish you could say here what you really think, too.

  10. Well written but all I can think of is a big ol’ nope! Bea isn’t thinking with her head or heart (even though she loves Jem, I think she is confusing friendship love with sex/lust love) and this is sad to see. She’s already experiencing the morning after regret and then Jem just keeps on pushing her into the box he wants without truly listening to her. “I love you” … “Marry me, TOMORROW”. How about seeing the doubt in her face and the hesitation in her voice? I have a feeling Jem is hiding something from her and this will be yet one more thing that tears them apart. Yes, she is mad at her mom but … to marry without telling either parent is wrong, petty and childish on so many levels. Bea, you have a lot of growing up to do before one can consider you to be a mature adult!

    • Your comment is so spot on, Addy. Bea is definitely not acting like a mature adult here and no matter what, she should never let anyone pressure her into marriage. That is childish and wrong, indeed. Jem isn’t listening to her and she isn’t listening to herself. Hopefully, they don’t make a royal mess out of their lives. 🙂

      • Time … and you … will let us know. 🙂 Hopefully they don’t ruin their friendship over this bit of rashness. It might be how Jem feels but his feelings shouldn’t be the only one that matters in this. Makes me wonder what type of relationship his parents have. Was it similar in how they met/got together? Hmm … if it doesn’t work out, how will it affect the friendship between their parents? More things to ponder while I wait to find out what happens next!

  11. The wordpress app on my phone won’t let me leave comments, so I’ve just been lurking. But I gotta come out of lurking for this! (Though I’m not sure the site recognizes me. Lol) First, congratulations on finishing gen 5! It was a wild ride, but it seems like we’re in for a wilder one xD Also, I love the new blog theme. It’s absolutely beautiful.
    Now, about Bea getting married… Well that was fast. Is she trying to make up for the fact that Holden got married later in his gen? I can see this going both ways, but being reluctant to tell your parents seems like a bad sign. I also don’t think Bea is in love with Jem. She loves him, sure. But not in the same way as him. Jem seems to have some unrealistic expectations here. Bea, like Rosetta, seems to be fiercely independent, and I don’t reckon they’ll be compatible married. I guess I’ll just have to sit back and watch the heartbreak unfold, though I wish the best for both of them.

    • I’m sorry the wp app wasn’t working on your phone. 🙁 That’s such a bummer. I’m so glad you’ve been lurking, though. 😀 And I’m even more glad you came out of lurking for this chapter! LOL 😀 Thank you for the congrats on finishing Gen 5! Bea has sure gotten off to a quick start in this Gen, that’s for sure. Thank you also for your kind words about the theme. I’m so glad you think it’s beautiful. I have finally found something I can live with. lol

      Holden did wait a looong time to get married, didn’t he? LOL I can see this going both ways for Bea, too. And I agree that if she can’t tell her parents about it, it might not be a good decision. She has so many doubts but isn’t paying much attention to them at the moment. She does take after Rosetta in many ways (let’s not ask Holden what he thinks of that, though! haha). Being independent is important to her, so this may not be the best thing for her or Jem. We’ll find out next chapter if they go through with this or not.

  12. That was fast.  Jem needs to slow is roll, and Bea needs to listen to her instincts!!

    I can only imagine how Holden and Ellie will react.

  13. Oh wow! I’m honestly very surprised, but maybe I shouldn’t be. Bea has had a sort of rebellious streak, hasnt she? Not in a mean way, but in the ‘I want to do what I want and I’ll deal with any consequences when they come my way’ way. 😉 She is very interesting! If she wants to get married, she’s old enough to make the decision for herself! I hope it works out for them! I suppose time will tell!

    • That is such a good point about Bea and the rebellious streak she’s shown. She does seem to think about consequences later after she’s made the decision. It’s something she did by moving to Sunlit Tides in the first place. Luckily, it worked out for her. Hopefully, this will work out for her, too. You’re right about one thing, time will tell. 1616

  14. Obviously I am a hopeless romantic type because this chapter made me so happy instead of being concerned that things were moving too fast haha. There are people out there who get married soon after meeting and have stayed together for a very long time, so I think that Jem and Bea have a fair chance at happiness since they practically grew up together. Sure, it’s fast and Bea will most definitely regret not telling her parents first. But she may be afraid that Holden or Ellie would try to talk her out of it. I would if I were her parents. 🤷🏻‍♀️ If Bea really does love Jem and doesn’t just think she loves him because they’ve known each other forever and have now slept together, I hope that they have a long and happy marriage! Though I suspect that’s too nice of a story and won’t actually turn out that way.
    Side note: I sincerely hope those two used protection! It was an act of passion, so it’s entirely possible that certain things were forgotten about. A baby would really complicate things especially if Bea backs out of the wedding or realizes she isn’t as in love as she thought! But for now I’m going to pretend that everything will turn out great, they will marry, have babies, and live happily ever after. Because I like to live in fantasy land. 😂
    Loved this chapter! I’m on the edge of my seat for this wedding. ❤️

    • I love that you’re a hopeless romantic and that this chapter made you so happy. You’re right that a couple can last for years and years even if they just met and married. Jem and Bea have known each other since they were toddlers, so they know each other pretty well. I hope this will be a fairy tale for our couple, but … you know … LOL 21 I think Bea needs to figure out whether she truly loves Jem as a wife should or if she loves him like a best friend. Will she do this before the wedding? You will find out next week. I like your pretend scenario. Hopefully, it’s not too far off. 

    • Thank you so much! I don’t think they’re as good as your pictures, though. 12 Yours are soooo good! 

      I love learning new recipes! Thank you for the link, but I got the dreaded, “This channel does not exist” message. 0505 

      • I always liked the way the picture turn out from sunlit tides and your pictures colours are very vibrant 🙂 we all have our own particular style that makes all our pictures unique.

        don`t know why that happened… just try putting in “FullyRawKristina” in you tube… you should find her this way 🙂

  15. I don’t think it’s a good idea because they are already in the “honeymoon” stage.  When reality raises its gnarly head, that’s when the real tests come!  And I also think Holden is going to be heartbroken because he didn’t get to walk his “chicken” down the aisle.  Oh yeh, young and foolish indeed!  undecided

    • Oh, yeah, that’s a good point about Holden and how disappointed he’ll be not to walk her down the aisle. Maybe that’s one reason she doesn’t want to tell her parents. lol You’re definitely right that when the reality of life hits them, and it will, they may face tests they weren’t expecting.

  16. What? So, that’s what you meant when you said that things were going to move forward fast? Well, I can sense a heartbreak in the future. As Louise has already mentioned, Bea is ignoring her gut feeling.You should only get married when you’re 100% sure you want to be with the other person. And she’s clearly not. It’ll be going downhill and fast. They might get divorced as fast as they will get married. Oh, Jem, what are you doing? God. This is so ridiculously misguided, I can’t even. I mean, even Shari waited longer.
    “As soon as he called me baby, I could hear Aunt Rosetta’s voice in my head telling me how degrading and repugnant that was.” Oh, “Aunt Rosetta said” right back at us!
    Wow, I am so shocked I don’t even know what more to say.

    • LOL Yes, this is what I meant when I said things would be moving right along. Pretty crazy, I know. And misguided, as you said. For sure. You might also be right about that future heartache you mentioned. She’s definitely not 100% sure and she’s not listening to her intuition on this either. Will they get divorced quickly? Time will tell, I know that much. As for Rosetta, we’re going to see how far-reaching her influence is in this generation. 0610

  17. “Oh. I guess we should talk.”Seriously, dude? You just gon’ waltz in her house unannounced, have sex, and expect not to have a conversation about what in the world just happened? Get outta here.
    Being with Jem intimately had left me confused but once I pushed that aside, I could taste the excitement he brought to my otherwise dull life. I could make this work because I knew him. He was comfortable and familiar.Tee hee hee :-DThis reminds me of you know who. I need to order more popcorn!
    These CRAZY kids are getting married now?! Oh come ON! LOL This is going to be rich!
    I hollered so loud upon learning Perla had been married four times! 12
    WHAT?! She’s not going to tell her parents?? What in the world!!! This is bananas!

    • Bananas is right! What is Bea thinking? LOL Oh, wait, she’s not. Your comment has me cracking up for real because all that was basically the commentary I was having in my head when I wrote this. LOLOL Pass the popcorn!

      P.S. Perla has had more than 4 husbands! 14

  18. I’m not sure this marriage is a good idea :/ I mean, they’re best friends and stuff, but how can they know if they work together as lovers? Living together and raising a family is different from hanging out as friends. And then Bea is kind of ignoring her gut feeling – she’s clearly nervous about it and he’s a bit pushy for my liking… You weren’t lying when you said this gen would be a little crazy, Kym! Great chapter! smile

    • LOL I never lie. 10 hehe This generation is going to move pretty fast, at least at the beginning here. I’m not sure they should get married either – oh wait, I’m writing this and I know what’s going to happen. I take that back. 😂 You’re definitely right, though, that Bea should be following her intuition to at least slow this train down. 

  19. Ouch… he railroaded her into that.  I can see them falling into bed together but that doesn’t mean they should get married.  Those little doubts and worries she. Has are for a reason… slow down….I did wonder if those two would wind up together.   I hope it works out.  

    • She doesn’t seem to be listening to her gut on this one so far. Jem isn’t picking up on her hesitation at all. LOL I hope it works out, too. Time will tell. 09

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