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Thursday, March 28, 2024
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Chapter 3.9: Dear Diary, in the Light

Dear Diary, when Dax and I returned to the house, I tried asking him more about Mango, but he put me off, saying that I needed to get some rest. Then, he left me, frustrated I suppose, to go back to his dungeon of a room.
During my shower, something kept tickling the back of my brain. Something, I began to feel, that I should have picked up on before now, but how could I have? At first, what was bothering me was still hiding in my troubled mind, so I tried to run back through the things Mango had said.
At one point, he’d asked if I knew him, as if I should have. Later, he mentioned a couple times that I hadn’t been his first choice. First choice for what? To contact? Had he tried contacting other people in the family? I knew now that he’d sent me the mysterious note that had brought me to Winchester. These things were all floating around in my dull, sleep deprived mind.
Then I remembered something Dax had said:

“Mango says he can will himself to other locations. He can look normal if he concentrates and he can even go places and be right in front of people and make it so they don’t even see him.”

Had Mango been right in front of us and no one had noticed?
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Then it hit me. As soon as I was dried off and dressed, I ran to my room and pulled out my father’s journal. He’d written about my birthday and how the entire family had attended the party.
Furiously flipping pages, I finally found the one I was after. Grandpa had said he had pictures he wanted Daddy to look at very carefully. They were of cousin Tia’s wedding to Grant. He asked if Daddy saw “it” but before Daddy could ask what he was supposed to be seeing, Grandma had interrupted.
Grandpa had then urged Daddy to have lots of pictures taken. Turning the pages, I looked carefully at each photo of that day, but I couldn’t really see anything unusual. It was just my crazy relatives having fun.


I even looked at the negatives since Daddy had kept them all in a small pocket he’d crafted into the inside front cover of the journal.
Nothing. Sighing, I turned to the photos again. Instead of concentrating hard, I let my eyes just wander over the images, smiling now because they were frozen in time also smiling.
I hadn’t seen any of these people in so long. All at once, I was perplexed as I was reminded how much time had flown by. I’d been here nearly a year and a half already, yet it felt like it had only been months. How could I have waited so long to call my father? My lower lip trembled as I reminded myself of the pain I’d surely caused him. We’d spoken only yesterday but with the way he sounded, I felt as if I should make the effort to call him more often.
Staring uselessly at the photos, I decided to name all of my relatives, one by one. There was Grandma, Grandpa, Daddy, Tia, her kids Ramona and Marvin. My finger glided over the page as I moved from person to person. Great-Aunt Keniesha in her pretty lime dress, Grant, Great-Uncle Sam who was now married to Aunt Keniesha… Aunt Rachel, Uncle Josh, Aunt Daylynn…….. My finger paused on a figure partly obscured by Daylynn in the picture. He had a shock of blond hair and was muscular.
149088762343006 (1)My heart was pounding uncomfortably in my chest as I pulled all of the pictures out again and began to circle the blond man wherever I saw him. Was it Mango? It had to be! This is what Grandpa had wanted my dad to see!
The pounding of my heart turned to an ache instead. I wondered how painful it might have been for Mango to return to see his wife remarried and happy. Had that made him happy or sad? I couldn’t even imagine. Why had Mango agreed to such a horrible deal anyway? It seemed pretty obvious to me, just from the little I knew, that he should have said no way to those scientists!
17
Unable to sleep, I decided to get on my chores in the garden. I’d been doing a lot of garden work lately since Old Treves was still recovering, and a lot of the help the St. Cyr farm usually had was still helping him and his family.
I was watering a plant, my mind still on Mango, when Dax’s voice broke in, “I thought you might be resting instead of slaving away out here.”
Shrugging, I said, “I couldn’t sleep right now if I tried. And I missed breakfast, so I thought I’d work off some of my anxiety.” Then something new and brilliant dawned on me. “Dax! What are you doing here?”
Grinning slightly, he joked, “Well, I can leave if you don’t want to see me.”
“Don’t be silly, you know what I mean. It’s day time and you’re out here in the sunshine.”
18
He was silent for a minute, bending down to pull some weeds from around a bean plant. Picking a green bean and wiping it off gently, he munched on it, then casually said, “Well, I thought I’d check things out. You know, see what’s going on.”
“That’s great,” I enthused, continuing with my work. “I’m really glad and I’m sure your brother and sister will be, too.”
He frowned slightly. “Elliott is.”
Pausing what I was doing, I straightened up to look at him. His expression was bland, but I could tell in his eyes that he was bothered. “What about Agathe?”
“She saw me, nodded and went the other way.”
“She must be busy this morning.”
His eyes seemed to darken and he looked away from me. It was obvious he had seen through my lame excuse. “You probably want to know what I have to say about Mango.”
“You have that right! When did he come here? What has he told you?”
“He came here long before I was born, when my parents were children,” he began to explain. As he told his story, we pulled weeds and watered the plants together. “When he arrived, the community was not pleased that he had arranged to buy the property where the cave is. But the family that owned that land, sold it to him and with the money, they left the island, never to return. You see, they should have had permission to sell their land to an outsider.
“At first, people were civil with Mango as he seemed pretty normal. But my grandmother and her small council wanted him to join the community if he was determined to continue living here. Although he wanted to be friendly with the community, he refused to assimilate into our culture. He explained that he only wanted to be left alone and that he would trade and buy from us for his needs. After a time, he only wanted supplies delivered to the cave at night. This was strange but he always had something to trade that was useful, so it was tolerated.
“One night, a local farmer named Aramis Quintrell stopped at the cave to deliver some vegetables. As he was stacking the crates at the mouth of the cave, he saw terrible, glowing eyes and ran away to tell the others. It was found out that Mango’s true form is what you saw last night, Blue. He’d been tired the night of the delivery, so he didn’t have the energy required to make others see him as normal.”
“Then what happened?” I asked breathlessly, waiting anxiously for every word.
“The community became frightened of him and would no longer associate with him. He was not allowed to come in town. The small council thought that if he had no one to trade with, he might go away. But he stayed because he knew the scientists wouldn’t find him here. I’m the only one who knows this about him as everyone is too afraid to approach him.”
19
What a horrific way to live, I thought. I found that my eyes were moist with tears and my heart still ached. It didn’t seem fair that Tia and Grace should have gone without their father for most of their lives, or that Keniesha should have to be without her husband… or Mango without his family. All because of one fateful decision that I imagined most people would have said no to. I supposed that not a day went by that Mango wished he could change that moment when he agreed to the scientists’ dubious plans.
“But why did Mango agree to the experimentation in the first place?”
“Of course, I asked him the same question. He told me that he had been a fairly good person, but not a very bright one; not until they accidentally infected him with the disease they were trying to cure. He said that it was the infection combined with the meteor strike that made him what he is now.”
“Is he looking for a cure?”
Dax shook his head as he bent over the next plant in the row. “No, not at all. He said he is here for a purpose greater than a cure for himself and that this purpose will redeem him.”
“How strange,” I murmured.
“And now you know what I know,” he said.
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After lunch, I went upstairs to rest for a few minutes. I couldn’t get what I’d learned out of my head but I was so pleased that Dax had ventured out and had even eaten lunch with us. Agathe seemed so uncomfortable around him that I began to think there was something I didn’t know.
I’d had enough of mysteries for now, though, so after my nap, I decided to go for a walk. As I went into the hallway, I nearly tripped on another painting that Dax had left for me. For something he had painted by memory, he’d captured that moment perfectly. I was amazed at how quickly he had painted it and my heart skipped a beat as I recalled being in his arms under the sunrise.
Taking a small shelf off the wall, I hung the new painting there and stood admiring it before setting out for my walk.
1
The afternoon had cooled some and didn’t seem as humid as previous days. I followed a path through the woods and came out at the inlet where Alice and I had often walked. At least I was beginning to learn my way around.
I reveled in the sounds of fish jumping and birds singing. It truly was a beautiful day. Just around the corner, there was a pile of hay bales where I knew I could sit for a few minutes and see if any animals happened by.
3
But I was not alone. As I came around a large bush, I stopped in my tracks, my eyes huge, unable to move as my brain could barely comprehend what I saw. Elliott and a scantily clad girl, holding hands by the hay bales! Obviously, I wasn’t meant to see this or they would be on the farm, out in the open. Who was she, anyway?
23
Paralyzed like a deer in headlights, she turned toward me and I heard her say, “We have company, Ell.”
It was Audrey-Ann from the hotel! The rude woman who had practically told Elliott that I was a celebrity’s child!
A pang of guilt washed over me in waves… guilt and anger. Why was I angry? Elliott could see whomever he wanted. But did she have to be so pretty? So blond and blue eyed?
I wanted to shake myself as I began to realize that my anger was stemming from jealousy. Why should I be jealous, though? Elliott and I weren’t involved.
4
Before I could ponder these feelings any further, Elliott had followed Audrey-Ann’s gaze only to realize I had intruded upon them. His face turned pale white, then red and he called out to me, I think more from surprise than anything else.
5
Regaining my senses, I turned away from the embarrassing scene and ran as fast as I could away from them, tears stinging my cheeks. Branches hit my face as I ran through trees back toward the house, biting at the delicate skin across my cheeks. But it didn’t hurt as much as my heart.
Every emotion you don’t want to feel seemed to coarse through my veins, through my soul. Jealousy, outrage, embarrassment, yes, they were all there, but I also felt that Elliott should see that this woman didn’t deserve him at all.
There was something else, too. Confusion. Why was I having any reaction to this at all? It wasn’t like they’d been making out… well, not that I saw. Perhaps they already had, or maybe they were now. I cringed at the thought.
6
Somehow, I hadn’t been paying attention and now I was off the path. I emerged from the woods at the main entrance to the farm, my breath coming in gasps, wiping my eyes on my apron.
“Hi, Blue!”
It was Matthieu. I tried to pull myself together as best I could and said, “Hey there, Matt.”
To my dismay, he sauntered over to me, a pleasant smile on his face. “Looks like you’ve really been running.”
7
Feeling more composed, I said, “Running is good for you.”
“Oh yes, I agree,” he enthused. “Where are you headed to? I could escort you if you’d like.”
8
Matthieu, sweet Matthieu. The way he always looked at me was unnerving. He was very handsome and extremely nice. Sometimes I just had the awkward feeling he wanted to be more than friends.
“Well, I’m just heading back to the house after a walk.”
“Me, too! Well, actually, I am coming back from town. I repaired a fence at the Delattre Farm. I guess the neighbor’s cow keeps getting into Mrs. Sylvie’s garden.”
“Yes, I was with Agathe when they were discussing the problem,” I said.
10
“Miss Blue, I’m glad I ran into you. I would really like to talk to you about something.”
I tried, but I couldn’t stop my eyes from turning as big as saucers. “Perhaps another time,” I said. “I have to help Alice with supper.”
Disappointment clouded his eyes. “All right. Maybe we could talk some other time when we both aren’t expected somewhere else. You see, I want to talk to you without being rushed.”
11
Good gravy, how was it that this was happening so often? Weren’t there any other young women on the island? I knew there were. And it wasn’t that I disliked him, in fact, I adored him. No, it was more that I couldn’t understand professing your eternal love for someone so quickly, without prior dating or anything. I needed to find out how things were done here, because it just seemed really fast to me.
12
“Well, I have to run! See you at supper!” I called over my shoulder, making my escape.
Author’s Note: If you would like to see the original pictures where Mango is hidden, they can be found in Chapter 2.16, Dear J, Birthday Bash

Kymber Hawke
Kymber Hawkehttps://booomcha.com/
I am a simmer, Rennie garb wearer, author, and dog petter. Judy Garland is my queen, horror movies & classic movies are my jam. INFJ with "Unity Hayes" as a pseudonym. A little bit eccentric, owned by two cats, Cesare & Josie-Pye. 🐱🐱

67 COMMENTS

  1. Somehow I have the feeling Blue expects much stronger feelings from all the men around her than there actually are.
    She is definitely very pretty, but it is rather unlikely that all available men present would fall for her, and that even without knowing her.
    But I bet she is lonely too.

  2. Well, there goes my ship, I guess. 😏
    Blue is confused, wants nobody and everyone. I wonder what are the community’s rules regarding dating outside of it. I know if they marry, the spouse must conform to the community style of life. But what about hookups? And possible illegitimate children? Would Agathe frown upon Elliott bringing the blonde woman to the island? I’m curious to learn what Blue finds out.

    • Awww I’m sorry. 🙂

      You’re very right about Blue’s state of mind. That’s a good question about the community rules, and Agathe will make the answer known in the future. Excellent questions about illegitimate children and hookups, too.

  3. So much happening!

    I feel bad for Mango. People fear the unknown, and he is a very, very big unknown and huge mystery.

    I wonder what’s going to happen with Elliott. I’m with Blue. That woman is no good for him. And Marrhieu…hmmm…I think there’s more to him than meets the eye.

    • All these guys to choose from, right? At the moment, it’s still all a toss up. lol

      As for Mango, he’s really paid for his bad decisions.

  4. That was such a loooong con that you pulled on us with Mango!
    I’m really looking forward to learning what his life’s “redeeming purpose” is.

    I have been really enjoying your Noble Doubt story! I have been reading a little bit at a time.
    Never looking at your generational summaries, I’ve been savoring one update after another.
    Whenever I stop reading for the day, I bookmark the next chapter on my browser.
    But today, I did a really stupid thing. I was looking at updates on WordPress’s Reader and clicked on a post titled “Dax in Paris.”
    Awww, shoot, totally spoiled things for me as an avid TeamDax enthuiast. Oh well.
    As the Highlander used to say, “There can be only one…” Guess I know who she ends up with now. *cries

    There are still a dozen mysteries left to unravel in Blue’s generation, though.
    I cracked up about Elliot autonomously hooking up with the hotel floozie, lol.
    Do you think Blue felt so possessive about Elliot because of his (slight) resemblance to Leo?

    • Oh no! I hate spoilers so I feel your pain. 🙁 I’m sorry that happened. What a bummer.

      I’ve been waiting a long time to bring Mango back into the story. lol

      That had me rolling, too, about Elliot. I’m not the only one with twists and turns up my sleeve; the game dishes them out, too. lol

      That’s a very interesting thought about why Blue felt so possessive about Elliot. I think it could very well have been a reason for her reaction.

  5. I totally saw Mango in those pictures back in gen 2, but then I get your updates in my feed, and sometimes I take a peek even though I’m not caught up. So eh… yeah, was totally spoiled. Still, if I hadn’t been a cheatery cheater, I wouldn’t have seen that – very clever foreshadowing 🙂
    And dang, Blue could have a hareem with all these guys!

  6. Wow! Great job on the pictures! I never noticed him! This situation with Blue thinking everyone is in love with her kind of feels like Juliana and Kevin but in reverse…but not the same lol. I guess it was the part about declaring love so quickly without dating first.

  7. So… Uhm… My mind is still spinning, so I can’t really say anything coherent right now. *scratches head* Sorry. Uhm… So many love interests too. Not much help with my spinning mind. Blue has a better head on her shoulders than I do with the way she’s “calmly” reacting to all these right now.

  8. Elliot!! You disappoint me man! Why don’t you choose one girl and stick with her for a while? I guess that crosses Elliot of the list!
    Poor Mango! The pictures were brilliant! I loved how you planned for this all along and left little clues here and there in various chapters… perfect! 😀

  9. Ah, I wonder if maybe Mango was talking about Liev when he said Blue wasn’t his first choice. I don’t know. It seemed like he was meant to remember. Anyway, these men are just so excited for Blue! And Blue’s just confused about all these feelings. I’m with you, girl. Feelings are hard. XD

  10. Interesting that Mango had attended that particular event. Can’t sat I feel sorry for him though. He willingly decided to become a lab rat for the scientists. Blues right most anyone else would have said no. No career ambitions is worth that. It was nice to see Dax in the sunlight. Too bad it was greeted with mixed reviews by his sister.interesting development with that girl and Elliot. At least she can cross one guy off her list. I like Matt he’s sweet. I think that Blue still has a lot of growing up to do before she’ll be ready to get serious with anyone. Plus she needs to go home and face the consequences of her running away.

  11. Holy cow! SweetPoyzin finally managed to catch up on a story!? I’ve missed a lot but I am finally caught up and SUUUUUUUUUUUUUPER excited about Blue’s story! I feel sorry for Blue. Picking one of these men will prove tricky. I think I am on team Dax but there are so many gorgeous choices. Excited to see where you take this one!

  12. I wonder if part of the Agathe thing isn’t what her dad always felt and feared about his own accident with Jilly? Maybe someone in this family is missing or was hurt as well? All kinds of possibilities. As for Blue being jealous? Silly girl, she needs to get her head on straight. She talks about it, but talk is cheap, because she hasn’t quite got her feelings worked out yet. LOL The Mango thing is interesting. I always wondered how her aunt supported herself in the style she was living all these years when Mango was no longer there? I mean they were still living quite high and insurance only lasts sooo long. What chapter was the meteor thing in ?

    • It kind of happened between chapter 1.19 and 1.20, so I wrote it into the story beginning in 1.20. And yes, you are so right about Keniesha still living rich long after Mango was gone. 🙂 Very observant.
      I agree that Blue needs to work out those emotions. And I really like your thoughts on Agathe as well. 🙂

  13. You are very good at foreshadowing. Well played, ma’am, well played.
    Oh, Blue. Just focus on you and let the guys worry about themselves. It’ll be interesting who she does end up with, but Blue’s got a lot to learn. It’s not dating someone that helps you figure out if you want to be with them or not; it’s KNOWING them. Spending time with them. Listening to their stories and going from there. And I’d say dear Matt has that down perfectly. Honestly, Dax sounds more infatuated with Blue than anything else. She’s exotic and unfamiliar, and thus interesting, not to mention beautiful. I think both he and Blue could use some time to figure themselves out before adding an entire new person to the mix. Elliot…hmmm…what’s going through his head, I wonder. Is he in a secret relationship, I wonder? 😀
    Now, if we’re only talking babies, I think Blax would make very beauteous babies indeed. ;P

    • Thank you so much, fluffymao 🙂 I think their babies would definitely be cute. 😀 But, you are so right about what Blue still needs to learn; I might have to quote some of what you wrote because you said it so well. 🙂 I think you’re probably right about Blue and Dax needing to figure themselves out. As for Elliott, that question will be answered soon. 🙂

      • By all means, quote away! It’s nice to know that at least some of what exits my mouth is useful to someone. XD
        I’m honestly intrigued to see where this love-square of Blue’s goes. If she get with any of them or is waylaid by someone very different later down the line. Slightly more itching for the curiosity scratch is Mango’s little predicament. It sounds like he hasn’t lived the best life in recent years.

        • Marvelous! I was writing along similar lines and you just made it so much easier, my friend. You will be credited, of course. 😀 I’m having a little bit of fun with Blue’s squareangle at the moment. Do you know that in game, the fickle girl had little hearts for all of them? It does not make sorting it all out very easy. haha As for Mango, you are very right about the fact that his life has been none too happy. You will learn all very soon. 😀

  14. And now she can tell her dad all about what happened with Mango. If shd decides that’s a good idea, that is.
    I’m still a firm BlueXDax shipper.

    • Thank you, Violincat! 🙂 It would be cool if she told, Leo, I think. Perhaps she will. 😀 Nothing will make you waver in your Blax shipping, I think. haha 😀

  15. So yes, Blue, you were jealous of Elliott. But what if it was Dax. How much more hurt would you be? Another team Dax fan. Or Blax? Maybe. Already want more!!! Such a great story!

    • LOL! Thank you so much! 🙂 Yes, how would it have been for Blue had it been Dax she saw with someone else? Hmmm…. that’s a really good question and poses more possibilities on the Blax situation! 😀

    • Thank you, Mama Dragon. 🙂 I hope the same thing, believe me. I’ve thought about how two of them are brothers and how it might change their relationship if she chooses one or the other. Somehow, this will all work out. 🙂

  16. Finally!! I have been waiting since Blue’s party to see if anyone would discover Mango there! It has been so hard keeping the mystery to myself so I didn’t spoil anything. So glad I don’t have to watch my wording now what a relief.
    Well good idea that Blue wants to learn how things are done and putting Matt off so she doesn’t hurt him. But the fact she is jealous over Elliot should clue her in on how things CAN happen so fast. I just wish she would realize she feels that way over Dax.
    Naughty naughty Elliot don’t leave that Sim alone unattended before you know it he will be making little copies of himself all over town.

    • LOL! Thank you, Lil! I know you’ve been waiting a long time and now the cat is out of the bag. Big sighs of relief! lol That’s a good point about Blue needing to realize how fast things can happen, as you stated. Oh boy, that Elliott… I turned my back for one minute in game and then he was chatting up Audrey-Ann! :O

  17. Another one on team Dax here! Wow, Blue sure has her pick of the crew, and may decide on none of them! I always love the underdog, so to speak, but right now, that seems to be Matthieu…nope, still team Dax!! I love the way you have been planning all these details for so long. The suspense really keeps me going, and begs to be a book! (hint hint) =D I laugh every time I hear “good gravy”, as that, and “good gravy sauce” were sayings my mom and grandma used all the time! I even say it, myself, which tickles the heck out of my kids! I am really looking forward to next weekend…hurry up!! I am waiting for the other shoe to drop on what Leo was talking about, and why they were going somewhere. Yup, more gray hairs!!! ♥

    • LOL! Thank you, Marj. 🙂 You know, my mom and grandma always said “good gravy,” too. lol And Blue picked it up from her grandma. Still on team Dax, I see. Well, we will have to see how it turns out. :O 😛 I think I owe you a lot of hair dye by now! hahaha 😀

  18. This whole Mango storyline has kept me on my toes! I have to wonder what his redeeming purpose is. And gosh, Blue had a more intense reaction to Elliott being with another girl than I thought she would. Surpressed feelings, maybe? And I also adore Matt but Dax is the ultimate guy! <3

    • Thank you, Raymond 🙂 I love the Mango storyline; it’s been in the works for a really long time. lol Blue did seem to react strongly to Elliott and I like Matt, too. Team Dax is going strong! lol

  19. You just finished a circle and I love this! I remember when he pointed to those pictures at that party and of course you dropped us a clue while also indicating it could just be his illness. Now we have come full circle to answer that question, well done! I wonder how many more of those will be answered in the next few weeks!
    Sad about Elliott. Adore Matthieu. Spending time with a doting Dax. Interesting, interesting. Will one of these guys be it? Or will she go back to her father and resume her life there. You are keeping us guessing RO!

    • Thank you, Bee! 🙂 I’ve been waiting a long time to finish this circle. lol There may be more to Elliott’s story than meets the eye, I will say that. 😀 Matthieu is really laid back and sweet. And Dax, of course, I hear a lot about team Dax. haha Those are good questions about Blue’s future! Hopefully, you will have answers soon. 😀

  20. My Goodness! And I never noticed that Mango was on these pictures, I can’t believe how wisely you planned it out. Well done! Blue’s love triangle (or a square, haha) continues. Three attractive guys and she still has to cry about that idiot Elliott, how can she? There is only one out there that paints for you! Oh, come on, make the right choice, Blue, and go #teamDax. Haha. I’m very objective about this as you can see.

  21. oh, wow.
    1) I really, really enjoyed the photo editing on this one — nice touch with the circled photos!
    2) ” No, it was more that I couldn’t understand professing your eternal love for someone so quickly, without prior dating or anything. I needed to find out how things were done here, because it just seemed really fast to me.” <– good thinking, Blue! She's got a good head — this is definitely far too fast. Maybe media has ruined me, but I am automatically suspicious of anyone who is THAT nice
    3) poor Mango 🙁 that sounds awful!
    Wonderful chapter — this story just keeps getting better! 🙂 Thank you for writing it!

    • Thank you so much, Em 🙂 I’ve been waiting for a long time to circle those photos! haha With all of Blue’s faults, this is one area where she is right. lol I’m so glad you enjoyed the chapter, thank you again for your kind words.

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